Sharing Secrets -- Log 9

Blogs,

Dog and walk

Discussion re not into it re cookies

Triggered

Once again I was under before I had time to thing about it

It seems that whenever you do it I find that the time is ok.

Relax more (wanted darker room)

Touches

Onto table

Played tape, spoke into other ear

Mostly mimicked the tape at first

Some of her own

Do get in her control, do want to hear her voice, do want to get her communications

I know there were others, but I do not remember them

Similarly, I’ve forgotten most of the suggestions from the tape even though I heard it twice. The tape seemed “new” – I was not remembering the phrases as old familiar ones or remembering what came next in the sequence.

Food analogies

Think of 10 things

At least 3 easily obtained

Hard to follow some of the language

Talk of why I like the surrender

No rejection, intimate, simple

Sit up to talk

The sitting up is probably a good way to keep me engaged and less passive

Look at camera and/or at her, blurry

Some ramblings, indistinct to me

Probably discussions about surrender and motivations

Like most suggestions, I remember the participation, but no specifics of the discussion

Lie down

Asked how it felt when I was given a command

Responded something to the effect that it was something to do

I was thinking of the lie down command, a very simple one, and answered in that context. I do get a feeling of …???… it is hard to describe, but it feels good, maybe “nirvana” is close … when given something compelling to do. Being commanded is being in another’s control in actuality rather than in theory. If I get in the surrendered mood where I’m ready to do whatever I’m told and nothing happens it is sort of like the surrender did not happen. Being given something to do and finding myself doing it is a strong confirmation that I had let go and surrendered to that level.

Need or desire to forget and to look at the camera later

1,2,3 wakeup

less of a rush of memories upon awakening

Normally I do sort of a session catalog just upon awakening, but this time I did not seem to do that. Later by your car you asked if I had been thinking more about the session and, to my surprise, I hadn’t been.

felt seduced

==== post discussions ===

she was surprised at what she had placed on the tape

Triple induction discussion

BDSM alternative –

Hypothesis: What I am looking for is what some bdsm people look for

But without the negative and hurtful aspects

Maybe some of them, or people at the borders, will be drawn

She had considered sexual persona ... but could not go through

She encourages me to find a way to see if my interest appeals to others, to see if there might be a community of those who might benefit as I have but within the same limits and without the meanness of the B.SM world.

One distinction comes to mind between this and what I see of BDSM relationships – when not in trance we deal with each other in a normal fashion whereas the BDSM people seem to want the dom/sub status to be an ongoing thing.

Park with dog

It is interesting that you were headed to XXX lakes, and to the back entrance. The natural place to park for one such entrance is XXX Park which is a bit close to home in a literal sense as I live on that block.

Man nearby, no hypno play.

I’ll be wondering for a long time what you had in mind. Maybe we could do something in ??? or ??? Hills if you wanted to try this again.

Her friend M finds me freaky, mentions that she thinks it is sexual thing

Me – close but not

Some statement that it was ok for it to be sexual, as long as it does not get into sessions

Almost broke lurk in [a Yahoo Group]

0 Comments:

Relaxed .v. Surrendered Rethink -- Commentary

The last session invalidates my prior thoughts about relaxed .v. surrendered because this was not a relaxation based induction, except for perhaps the R trigger, yet I was very passive. I do remember that in the prior chatty session that I would still freeze and listen attentively whenever I was being given a suggestion/command, and last week was all command, so maybe I just passively froze and listened attentively the whole time.

The pendulum was very nice, by the way. While you could have just triggered me into trance, the pendulum was a slower and profound descent, and gave you a chance to frame the session.

A double induction will be interesting considering that I was so far gone last time with that used as a single induction. Right after you woke me up I almost blurted out a very confused “what just happened?” except that I did not have the coordination. By the time I had the coordination I had figured out that I had been under.

0 Comments:

An experiment

It is 11:15 at night and all others are asleep. I’ve composed my session log above and have no more edits or reviews planned. The experiment is that I’m going to reread that suggestion list I sent to you and which you used as the basis of many of today’s suggestions and see what happens. I’ll write it up just afterwards and then cease reexamination of this log.

. . .

Boy, that was a surprise! I did not buzz out or react strongly. Quite the opposite, I read them with much less emotional attachment than I’ve ever read them before. Not at all what I expected. Before they had a sense of longing/need/desire/urgency where I was wanting/seeking a place where they would be true, but tonight they are not emotionally charged.

I just tried to envision hearing one of these in your voice, and I did react and start a slight buzz that is still lingering, and I ceased ½ way through the first statement as soon as the reaction started.

Rereading them in my voice with this buzz is slightly more emotionally charged than before, but not like the times I’ve read these before.

What does this mean? Unclear. A simple answer would be that the unmet need that caused these to be emotionally charged was met, but this explanation seems too easy.

OK, one more experiment for me I’m about to re-reading them asking myself what to change or add (it is 11:30): … Hmm, nothing came up except for some intensification of the buzz.



Now, if you were to say them ….

0 Comments:

Where is this going? -- Commentary

I don’t know where this is going or even that it will necessarily go anywhere. Repeated massage sessions, for example, are not on a track to going somewhere. I do have a lot less pent up want/need for what I have gotten from these sessions. If they stop it would probably build up again. I do seem to be benefiting physically and in attitude and that might revert.

I think it may be that we don’t know exactly what it is, but it is working. (Note: It may be as simple and as profound as “stress relief” except with an unusual path to get there) I do enjoy the sessions themselves, and I am benefiting, and as long as this continues I would be wanting to continue. It may be that the sessions reach some steady/stable core and remain there for some time. With a massage, no matter how good it was the body can use another massage after a while. Similarly it may be that periodic hypnosis releases some other kind of build up.

0 Comments:

Pendulumized into Sweet Surrender -- Log 8

Normal font holds my journal of what happened, colored fonts hold inserted discussions about some aspect. You should read just the black text the first time as the black reflect my original event and first impression log while the blue contains later thoughts about those events.

Went to room

Video camera present (later found to be discharged)

Discussion of session with B, where this is going – what are my plans, cost of sessions

Me: Hypnosis first, massage secondary, was ignoring massage when X was in room

Discussion of B’s 3 inductions, 2 unremembered

Discussion of being cold and unable to initiate a response to it

B learned

X not getting much from having B there, different dance and hard to coordinate

I’m uncertain about continuing with B in solo sessions. I’m just not that into massage but am starting to agree with it as a taking care of my body thing. The main obstacle to me would be the logistics of 2 sessions in a week (I’d not choose to drop your session).

Was semi-buzzed. Reacted to hand gestures and other unintentional signals from X

Made comment re might as well be a pendulum

X opened her pendulum box (she has a pendulum box?) and made one for me

Maybe I should pay more attention to the other items in the room. ;->

She seems to make personalized pendulums – this one might take on a special meaning for me.

Discussion of time spent – X and B spend a lot of time on me

Partially from their interests

X likes the emailed logs and the blog

Area of concern is session time management

Last time I was somewhat manic when awakened, was insensitive to end of session comments

Discussion of side effects –headache, if impacting work

Discussion of clothing

I made comment that I knew she was tolerant but uncomfortable

Do I want water comments – some borderline suggestive

Stare at pendulum, waist level (lower than my sitting eye level)

Demonstration of yes/no swings

Strong messages re letting go, surrendering, not planning, compulsively doing everything she says – I felt attention and attitude changes occurring

R trigger, slumped deeply

Several deepenings

X left room to get something (I may have this out of sequence)

Raise head, open eyes, looked at her with blurry eyes – then told to have bleary eyes

Picture taken

More pendulum, this time at shin level

Very strong surrender messages, letting go, obeying her completely and fully, surrendering my will to her

Very strong response from me

At times “donut vision” – a first for me

Like tunnel vision where I saw the pendulum but not her pants behind it

It was floating in its own space

But did see with outer edges of peripheral vision

It was like my central retina area (with the detailed vision) developed tunnel vision, but the peripheral vision didn’t. Strange.

Donut vision effect faded in and out

Don’t know how this pendulum phase ended. Found myself back eyes closed in chair.

Asked if I wanted to be in table

Uncoordinated walk to get there

On table

A few “yes” responses from me in response to questions like “doesn’t it feel good to …”

Tape recorder started, asked to not speak

Was read some variant of things from my “how to let go” list and things of her own

Some things I recognized clearly as my own

Some might have been rephrasings

Some were clearly from X

They all seemed fresh, all seemed interesting, all seemed right

I accepted them all

While I recognized many of them at the time, I’ve forgotten what they were and how they were phrased. All I retain is the feeling of getting them. Hypnotic memory is interesting!

Felt body disappear, reappear, disappear

Was VERY passive

Suggestions re exercise, continue to look younger, quality time with family, inhaling food

FYI: The inhale thing is to be inhaling through my mouth as I raise food to it, inviting lose particles into my windpipe.

Awake

Arms felt heavy, hard to move (went away after sitting up)

Mellow

Post discussion

Was definitely deep, passive

Saw pictures (tiny screen) – boy did that guy look out of it!

X commented that there was not much difference before and after the N trigger

But you basically N’d me with the pendulum induction talk, so the trigger was rather moot by then.

Domination?

Paternal 50ish hypnosis

But one where the decision making is allowed to be suspended

It is some form of domination, but not the same as found in the domination world

How would she advertise to find ones like me and not wanting the other stuff?

If I knew, I would have found those hypnotists already. Searches I’ve tried tend to turn up BDSM folks who occasionally use hypnosis. I have not found a criteria that works for what I seek.

Do you love me?

Me: no, there are boundaries

I love what she does to me, how I feel in the sessions and from the sessions

Discussions re where this is going, basically if I have some undisclosed objective

She trusts until messed over once

Discussion re sharing blogs and the session logs

I would be fascinated to see session logs such as mine. As much as I’ve read I’ve never seen ones like these. The danger is that they might reveal too much or be associatable back to the participants. I’m kind of figuring on using a 1-year rule I’ve applied to some decisions – if a decision is attractive but questionable, see how it looks after 1 year.

General discussion about blogs and communities – but would have run too long

Invited to join her yahoo group, even if just to lurk

I had wanted to give her a place to discuss without me

She said that the reaction to her bringing it up caused her to back away from this in the group

I mentioned that I knew the group name from the emails

Got a “are you stalking” question

Noticing things in electronic text is a core job skill for me.

General Comments

Well, you now have what may be a perfect tape for dual inductions for me. I probably can’t help but to listen attentively to that leaving you with a wide open other ear in which to plant whatever suggestions you have in mind for that week.

Great session for me.

0 Comments:

Hypno-Massage -- Log 7.5

Normal font holds my journal of what happened, colored fonts hold inserted discussions about some aspect. You should read just the black text the first time as the black reflect my original event and first impression log while the blue contains later thoughts about those events.

Greeted in liv room off atrium

Taken to massage room – table, exercise bike

Started to talk, given the R trigger

Semi slumped – not as profoundly as in other times

Told was going to get a massage

Good, this sets expectations

Somehow switched sides

Told that I will undress as far as I am comfortable. Then told that I may keep undies on.

To lay on table, cover, and tell B when ready. B left room

Felt myself going deeper when undressed

Prior massage experience makes me comfortable without undies, so the suggestion that “I will undress as far as I am comfortable” meant that I would remove them. The next suggestion that “I may” keep them did not override this.

Uncoordinated stumble to table and cover

B started with strokes

Some time later around the time of the legs, B did a “N” trigger

Felt a small but profound shift in my attention and attitudes

I was totally focused on B, her voice, and her touches

I felt ready to be commanded and to do whatever she told me

Felt unquestioning of my state and receptive to B

I like the two phase approach

Awakened and questioned on touches

Retriggered (do not remember which trigger or going back under)

Time to turnover

Sheet removed

Intellectually I know now that B was probably doing that standard massage practice of holding the sheet up between her and me, but my awareness at this time did not extend to awareness of what B was doing, it ended a foot or so away from my body.

Turned over and settled down

Second time awakened and questioned, then retriggered (again w/o memory of the retrigger). Do not remember if this was after turnover.

Ok to take care of body, ok to want massage (and B), ok to be there

Cold, shivering

Did not have the initiative to cover my arms

Waited to be asked before doing anything

Hands on head

I mumbled about my mind being open

B gave 4 or 5 basic belief and attitude statements

I felt them go in and “stick”, visualizing them as perms dropped into my frontal lobe.

I’m trying hard as I write this, but I cannot remember what these statements were, but when I think about it I still feel like the perls in the frontal lobe are still there

Awakened and dressed

In living room asked how I felt

Dizzy, memory fade

Asked if I wanted water

Some discussion while standing

Thinking and the lack of it while hypnotized, just experiencing

I had seemed conversational last week, like I was aware


Post Session Comments

The triggers were interesting last time. I remember the initial r trigger and the n trigger you used later. The first induction trigger seemed to not have as deep effect as it sometimes has had, but it was profound enough. I remember waking up but am confused as to if you had me wake up 2 or 3 times. What I don’t remember at all is going back under after waking up. I don’t know what triggers you used or how I reacted. I know I ended up back under but the timeline does not exist in my head. I’ll be curious how I’ll react this time.

I think that there is something to the triggers being used by surprise. When they are I am surprised – surprised to find that I’m back under and still going deeper. If I knew a trigger was coming I might mentally prepare and my planned expectations could affect the trigger. When surprised, the hypnotically conditioned reaction sets in before there is any time to consciously consider how I want to react and *poof*, I’m back in that relaxing nirvanic la-la land.

0 Comments:

Hypno-Massage Ideas

Some thoughts that occurred to me overnight:

There are a couple of things I'd find interesting if you chose to incorporate them. Please don't take any of these as "must haves", instead use only those that fit with a style that is comfortable for you.

It would be nice to be triggered without warning before preparing for the massage.

You could deepen this trance and give me suggestions that you are a good hypnotist and I'll be responding to you as fully as I respond to X. (Of course, you can also give me suggestions that you give a great massage, or any other suggestions you think set the stage for a good session.)

Wake me up and trigger me back under several times during the session.

You can use these alert times to get feedback. Don't worry that these will destroy the relaxation or hypnotic effects -- there is a hypnotic deepening technique known as fractionation where people are repeatedly cycled between awake and under, so my awakening me and retriggering me you would actually be deepening the trance and relaxation. Alternatively, if you don’t want me to be fully awake, you could suggest that I sit up and become alert and ready to communicate but that I stay deeply under.

Reinforce the triggers

At some point reinforce the triggers, especially with respect to you. Make it clear to me that the triggers work for you and X and that they are irresistible

Post-hypnotic

It would be cool to have another post-hypnotic behavior implanted (like that “chair” thing but with an unmistakable trigger).


Again, none of these are “musts”, they are just ideas. You are also welcome and encouraged to take some of the session time for yourself, to use it for your own learning, exploration, or amusement. Don’t think of this as taking time away from me, I can assure you that al long as I’m deeply under I’m benefiting, and I’d probably also find whatever I was doing to be educational or amusing (if I even remember it). You can even go so far as to tell me something like “this is my time, I have some things I want to try and you will be happily doing all of them”.

0 Comments:

I'm Enjoying This

I really enjoy the freedom and release of letting go, giving you this influence, letting you take over completely, allowing you this “certain allowing”. I had been feeling some guilt/unease over it but between your emails and some changes that happened in the last session this has been significantly reduced and I’m enjoying that. I would love for you to hypnotize me into fully accepting this, where I just know and accept that I’ll be letting you take over, hypnotically fully immersed in your control, and where I know that this is acceptable or even desirable to you and I do not fear that this will be too unusual for you.

0 Comments:

Blog Comment Trigger

X placed in acomment:

When it is safe, and only when it is safe, I want you to take two to ten minutes to buzz tonight. You may give yourself a trigger phrase which you will hear very clearly in your head as if it came from me. Do nothing else. All healing suggestions will be automatically and instantaneously available, creating deep and lasting pathways in your brain, making these healthy behaviors inevitable, compelling, and permanent.

> So, what happened when you went to the blog?

I read the part “When it is safe, and only when it is safe” I developed a small buzz and quit reading as it was not at that time safe. I was filled with curiosity as to what followed and eager for the safe moment to arrive. When it was safe, I returned to the message, was definitely buzzed reading it.

I start re-buzzing every time I re-read parts of it while making this reply. It seems when I get a commanding statement from you “e.g. When … you will …” I’m automatically buzzing when I read it.

I’ll probably eventually figure out the relationship between the buzzing and a regular trance, but I have not yet figured it out. The buzz is clearly a hypnotic effect and involuntary, I’m pre-disposed to cooperate while buzzing, and my attention does narrow so it is some sort of trance thing, but where it falls in the spectrum of hypnotic behavior is not yet known to me.


I like the idea that I might be getting an out of the blue hypnotically compulsive statement from you now and then when you’re feeling playful or when you see a place where it might help me. One of my persistent benefits is the relaxation effect I get from remember that not only was I feeling that Nirvana, but that I’ll get there again. That a compelling statement might arrive outside of pre-negotiated session times hugely augments this effect because it extends it in that “it could even happen in the next minute or two”.

I did act on your message. The trigger I used was just remembering your voice telling me the “r” trigger and then, after I was eyes closed and slumped (but not nearly as profoundly as when you are there) I remembered the “n” trigger and felt a blissful eagerness to …. well, I wasn’t sure … but I was blissful and eager. I started to review what I interpreted as helpful suggestions and ones like the cookies came up but also ones related to letting go, allowing the hypnosis to happen, etc. I guess these qualified to me as helpful.

I probably stayed under for no more than 2 minutes. I don’t really know what caused it to not be longer as there were no environmental disruptions and I had not chosen to awaken. It may be my general inability to stay self-hypnotized while self-directing.

0 Comments:

Fully Letting Go -- Checklist

I’ve thought about what it might mean to me to fully let go. These things came up:

Timing of trance

You chose when I must be under
I will go under, irresistibly, whenever and wherever you want
I will stay under for as long as you want

Decision Making Suspension

I must follow every suggestion/command, I have no choice.
I will do anything you say, no matter what it may be.
I will eagerly obey without reservation or hesitation., I want to obey

Responsibility Absolution

I have no responsibilities other than to follow and experience.
I am not responsible for any actions I might take while under
Since I am not responsible, it is not important for me to monitor my actions carefully or to remember

Care Absolution

I will not care or worry about whatever might happen while under.
Anything that happens while under is OK.

Filter Removal

I will be completely free, natural, spontaneous, and uninhibited.

Embarrassment Protection

I will not be embarrassed or bothered by anything that might happen.
Anything that happens is in a separate world.
Anything that happens is normal and natural to the setting.

I will not be embarrassed by being so fully under
It is ok to want to be fully under, it is not embarrassing to want this release

Judgment Absolution

I will just experience and will not need to evaluate or judge whatever may happen.
I will not be judged or evaluated based on whatever may happen as long as I’m following suggestions

Thoughts

My mind is open to you

I will think anything directed

I will truthfully answer any question
I will not mind answering, I want to tell you my secret thoughts
It is ok to feel open, exposed, or vulnerable. It is safe to be this way with you
I want to
reveal all so we can heal all and improve all

No filters

I will just experience and will not need to evaluate or judge whatever may happen.
I will let go, I will not maintain any filters on actions or thoughts, you will decide
I will be completely natural, you will accept charge of my actions, I will follow any direction you give

Message of acceptance

There will be no adverse reactions or undesirable consequences derived from being this fully under
Whatever I say, do, or reveal is a secret confined to the sessions

0 Comments:

Does Massage Enhance Hypnosis?

Net: To me, hypnosis enhances massage because it encourages relaxation and being into the moment. However, massage does not enhance hyponosis for soemone who can get into deep hypnosis without it. I would recommend a massage based progressive relaxation induction for someone who does not like other approaches.

=====================

We’ve done three joint sessions with some effect, but I’d like our next session to be a solo one. However, I am open to separate solo sessions with each of you. (You would have permission to share these session experiences between yourselves as you wish.) The massage is nice but it does cause a different session feel that a just hypnosis session and I’d like to re-experience a just hypnosis session.


Similarly, I’m probably cutting B out more than I’d like – you can notice, for example, that these session notes have no massage comments whatsoever. It may be that with X present that I focus there to the exclusion of B and the benefits of her massage and that if it were just B there I’d develop a focus where her efforts are more beneficial. I’ve benefited from hypno-massage more in the past than in these sessions and maybe I need to relearn how.


I’m very confident that a solo session with B would be successful even while I suspect that B might be less confident. I would even expect that B will become much more confident and comfortable with hypnosis as a result of such a session. First off, she would be deciding the session flow without the need to follow another’s (X’s) flow. Secondly, I’d expect that she would have some major hypnotic epiphanies including that the hypnotic state is not that hard to induce or to maintain, that it is not that fragile, that it has multiple forms of expression, and that it can work with her style. My approaches to hypnosis differ in some significant ways from a more typical client but in many ways I’m just another hypnotized person. I am probably a perfect training person for getting used to being a hypnotist because my trances are not fragile, because I can communicate while hypnotized, because I can experience trance in a wide range of styles, and because I’m not loaded with pre-conceived fears of hypnosis or a specific plan I’d like the session to follow. Also, unlike most clients, I can actually teach how to best deal with the hypnotize me – If B finds a point where she is wondering how to get me mentally to a particular point, she can just ask me and I’d probably come up with workable suggestions. I’m confident that the session would be a success, that I’d benefit, and that Helen will pick up hypnotic experience she can start to consider using when appropriate with other clients.


It would also be interesting to have a dual session the week after solo sessions where we’d see if and how my and your reactions have deepened or change as a result of the separate experiences and if that makes the joint experience involve more levels.

0 Comments:

Self-Hypnosis .vs. Self-Control -- Commentary

> you are hypnotizing yourself, so all she has to do it trigger you.
Ahh, this is close to the “all hypnosis is self-hypnosis” thing.

From a practical viewpoint, it does not matter to me in the least how much of it is self hypnosis and how much is not as long as I get a sip from that bottle. However, as one of the groups you read has been discussing the “all hypnosis is self-hypnosis” thing, I thought I throw in my prospective for you to incorporate or discard as you see fit.

I clearly am at times hypnotizing myself, probably at most times. I do think that there are probably times when it is not so much my hypnotizing myself – the double induction last week comes to mind as the best example because I was so preoccupied with the two streams that there was not much “self” left to assist with the hypnosis. Even with a regular induction I start with thinking about what I’ve been told, agreeing with it, and incorporating it but as the depth of trance gets established the “thinking about what I’ve been told” part weakens or fades and the “agreeing with it, and incorporating it” part remains and is running in a more automatic fashion. A distrustful client might not let go of as much of the “thinking about what I’ve been told” part and by not doing so they miss an opportunity and limit their trance.

There is also a distinction between who is doing the hypnosis and who is directing the trance. Even if we conclude that a conventional interpretation of the statement that “all hypnosis is self-hypnosis” were completely true all the time, it does not mean that the hypnotized person is necessarily self-directing. I know that when you have me deeply under that I am most definitely not deciding what I want to do or even thinking about what I want to do. I may be feeling different levels of satisfaction about what I happen to be doing, but I’m not deciding or thinking about what I want to do. This does not necessarily mean that that I would do anything you might possibly say as some things might cross an ethical or self protective boundary, but it does mean that I’m not choosing my own immediate destiny. I do get impulses and can occasionally articulate them but getting one of these from-the-subconscious or from-prior-experiences flashes is not at all the same as planning or deciding to do something.

The net is that even if self-hypnotized, the hypnotized person might be “under the control” of someone else at least to the degree that the suggestions from that someone else does not trigger an ethical or self-protective rejection. The “hypnotist” is in control of many things and the client is in control of other things and what falls into each side depends on the two people involved and their desires and expectations.

Again, the above prospective is for the purpose of developing our understandings. With regard to the benefits I get from our sessions, the distinctions of if it is self hypnosis or not or exactly where that control boundary lies are academic and of no practical value.

0 Comments:

Relaxed .vs. Surrendered Commentary

Regarding my being more chatty and interactive, if is probably the distinction between being relaxed (e.g. passive) and surrendering my decision making, planning, and self-monitoring. I’ve commented before that “relaxed” is for me not a synonym for “hypnotized” and X can probably confirm that relaxation is not a prerequisite for hypnosis, that people can be hypnotized with their eyes open or even while on exercise bikes.

Most of my sessions have had a strong “relax” theme, with becoming more and more deeply relaxed being the strongest induction theme. It seems reasonable that if I am so relaxed that I’d be passive and would find it hard to speak or participate in any physical way. Along with this seems to come a frequent fear in the hypnotist that any but the most trivial physical action will break the relaxed state and in so doing also break the trance.

The surrendering is different, it is using the narrowing and focusing of attention to take away my inclination or ability to form independent plans, to question what is happening or what will be happening, to even consider whether I want to do something, or, at its best, to do anything except to deeply want to do whatever my compelling hypnotist just commanded. It also takes away from me responsibilities related to planning and judgment and forces me to simply and intensely experience.

The two themes of relaxation and surrendered compliance are related in trance and feed on each other but neither one has to be there. X probably routinely has people relaxed and not surrendered and could probably if she so wanted have people hypnotized and suggestible without being either relaxed or surrendered and possibly not even aware that anything is happening.

This session there was more of a surrender theme than a relaxed theme and, probably when the relaxation waned for some reason, I became interactively chatty. Not being passive and maybe some lingering effect from a command to tell you how I was feeling caused a pretty spontaneous flow of thoughts from head to mouth. Also, being “relaxed” probably slows down the thought processes more than being simple surrendered, so there were more thoughts to flow.

It is an odd feeling. I know that I chatted, I remember the feeling of a faster flowing conversation and that it seemed to be more of a conversation, I think many of my comments were about how I was feeling or what effect the hypnosis was having on me, but I remember just a phrase or two of what was said. In contrast, I can remember in detail pre and post session discussions. I do remember observing/catching myself in some clearly hypnotic behavior or thought, knowing that it was a hypnotized thing, laughing at myself for doing of feeling it, sharing this observation, but still being totally compelled/willing/eager to continue the behavior. (However, I no longer remember what was the thing or behavior.) That I had enough alertness to notice had no bearing on my compliance – it probably is a trance logic thing where I can accept multiple conflicting realities, one where I’m observing and entertained by that deeply hypnotized guy and his funny out-of-his-control behaviors while concurrently being that deeply hypnotized guy. That I knew of the behavior did not mean that I had the capability or even the desire to stop myself. If this were a stage show, I am both the volunteer and the audience. (Hmm, according to the “all hypnosis is self hypnosis” community I’m also the hypnotist.)

I do have the impression that whenever X started stating a firm suggestion/command that I basically froze and listened intently to whatever she was saying. I can also state that I probably did this several times, I cannot remember the specifics of any of what she said – not the exact words or even the intent of the suggestion/command. All I remember is the feeling of listening and the tone of her voice. (You’ll have to tell me if I followed the suggestions, because I have no idea what they were or if I did them.)

I do remember some conversation near the end regarding a wish to package what I was experiencing in a bottle. I guess we can now all see that this effect is therapeutic all by itself and that there does not need to be some other more conventional hypnosis goal thrown in order for the session to have value. Even if a session were pure “stage show” it does not matter to me as long as it allows me to drink from that bottle.

So I recommend that you two take advantage of this state knowing that just your putting me there is very beneficial to me and giving me what I seem to somehow need. You are free to have fun with me, to explore hypnotic effects, to improve your skills, or even to express the controlling aspects of your personalities knowing that as long as you keep me “there” that I’m benefiting. Just take care to discuss with me before hand any suggestions that would cause behavioral changes outside of the session because our lives follow different tracks and in the complexity of what I deal with the suggestion could have ramifications you never intended.

B: Regarding your concern over disrupting my state of mind – my hypnotized state of mind is probably more resilient than you think, but if not, so what -- go ahead and disrupt it. You can think of it like the turn over in a massage. Sometimes you must think that the client looks so relaxed that you are reluctant to bother them by asking them to turn over, but you find that while this is momentarily disruptive after a few minutes you’ve put the client right back where they were. You might disrupt, but you can also restore. Also, changes are themselves good and hypnosis enhancing – some sort of mental immune reaction kicks in when any one state has been experienced for too long. It may be as simple as the mind at first is busy adjusting to that state but after awhile the adjustments are over and the mind goes looking for something else to keep itself occupied. For the deepest hypnosis, you have to direct what occupies my mind rather than letting it go back to its everyday pattern of thoughts. By changing activities or changing between passive and active you recapture my complete focus. If I’m thinking some equivalent of “what the ??? is going on here” I’m probably totally focused on you and what is going on and this total focus and your direction of it is the core of hypnosis. Net: Changes are good and changes deepen hypnosis.

Practical suggestion re Relaxed .vs. surrendered

I have (at least) two current triggers. We should probably keep (and reinforce) both.

  • "R" one – to make me relaxed, passive, sleepy, open to suggestion. Of course, this should be given and reinforced when I’m most feeling that way
  • "N" one – to put me in a state of complete surrender, where I’ll willingly and eagerly do whatever you say, where I want to comply, where I’m open and vulnerable, where I want to be surrendered

Taking the bottle humor one step further into the more classical therapeutic world. X (or B): what if somebody did sell (legally) a bottle that if they took a sip the client would become entirely blissful while being open, vulnerable, chatty, unfiltered, granting access to the inner thought stream or even to unconscious thoughts, who wants to participate, who wants to answer, who is not only open to your directions but actively wants to follow them and whose mind is in such a state that you can cause significant changes in behavior, belief patterns, or attitudes? Would you buy the bottle? Would you offer your clients a sip? (Would you take a sip yourself, and with whom?)

0 Comments:

Sitting up Eye Contact Impulse -- Commentary

The impulse I felt to sit up and open my eyes is probably an artifact of prior hypnotic experiences where I’d be roused from a prone more or less passive state to be sitting and looking into her eyes. She would be maintaining some physical touch, typically her hands on my shoulders, holding my neck or head, or holding my hands or arms (she was a massage person before being a hypnotist, so touch was not a touchy area for her). I would be looking into her eyes and listening to her voice while her words were going straight in – I remember being blissfully happy soaking up the experience and bonding to the experience.

Hypnosis is primarily a narrowing and direction of attention, and looking back at it from an awake prospective I can see that there were several concurrent factors that made this so effective. One was being hypnotized already, so I was receptive. Touch focuses – you can’t help but pay attention to somebody who is touching you, especially if they use their touches to emphasize their points. Eye contact is also intimate and captivating and her closeness made this stronger. Her voice was echoing in my head and her voice tones were ones that commanded attention. Also I was still in the “shock” of a change – moving between passive to active unsets any self-created thought patterns and I’m particularly vulnerable to external direction. With all of these factors working together it seems natural that I was in a blissful state (which I had not yet associated it with Nirvana) and natural that I don’t remember her words. It was in some of these moments that I had what was probably the most profound signs I’ve ever had of being hypnotized – I developed physical tunnel vision where the room would darken and then black out except for a narrow field of vision that generally encompassed her head but sometimes even narrowed to just her face or even to just her eyes. (I wonder what would have happened if it had narrowed even further? Could I have literally “blacked out” in this state and, if so, what hypnotic behaviors would she have seen?) I certainly was feeling profoundly hypnotized at these times and also profoundly blissful/happy.

Typically she would take me from this sitting eye contact reinforcement phase back to a prone passive phase and the oscillations were very effective. It may be similar to the hypnotic deepening that happens with fractionation except that I’m shifting between two flavors of hypnosis rather than between hypnotized and awake. The effectiveness of fractionation may be from the change of state rather than necessarily from the wake up/go under cycle. If it is the cycling that is effective, then this might be even more powerful than fractionation because you are cycling between two hypnotized states going under more deeply in different ways in each.

0 Comments:

Unorthodox Therapeutic Relationship

The relaxation I felt (and logged about today) occurred naturally as I reflected on the Nirvana thing. I’m really drawn to the Nirvana as it does give me the most profound and longest lasting stress release and it even gives me a re-release whenever I think back on it or realize that I would be there again within minutes with just a trigger or two.

I’m also drawn to the ideas of 2 triggers. One would be like "r" and would make me very relaxed and suggestible. The other would be stronger and Nirvana based. When used it would have me place you or B in charge, that for a change I would completely let go of my decision making, self observation, self-consciousness, planning, or alertness and instead simply enter a state where I’m focused on you or B and on your words, feeling a deep compulsion to follow them fully and completely, where I want to comply, where following gives me comfort and release, and where I’m open and irresistibly drawn into any experiences or behaviors you may suggest. To make the experience complete you could also have the trigger cause any remaining awareness and inner dialog I have to become focused on being willing and eagerly compliant, focused on wanting to do fully do whatever is suggested, and on becoming completely immersed mentally, emotionally, and physically in whatever you say.

You recently thanked me for giving you so much influence over me. Well, I am very appreciative of you for allowing me this. I know that this is on the far edge of hypnotic interaction and that it can be unsettling to some, especially to any from the "lets make hypnosis as unscary as possible" camp. I’ve often been concerned that you might find it just too weird or too different from your normal style and I would lose this for me very effective outlet. I was surprised last week at your great gift and later at your firm echoing of the surrender and hypnotic compulsion theme because after trying it once you’ve been somewhat avoiding it and I had not expected that you would come back to it with B present. As you were echoing and reinforcing my surrender I was in part feeling "here I go!" and in part wondering if that would be the last for B, that she might find that level of deep influence to be beyond her comfort level.

This raises another point, that I am often uncomfortable or feel somehow that I should be uncomfortable with wanting this profound feeling and relaxation, or that I should feel some sort of guilt for encouraging a hypnotherapist past their standard procedures. I am not sure why I seem to need this deep letting go and why it is so helpful to me, but it is. It may be along the lines that I stated in your forwarded message, that want, expect, allow are conscious mind stuff and belief is unconscious mind stuff and the unconscious mind wins all conflicts. Whatever my conscious explanations, it may be simply that some unconscious parts of me need a firm and simple model in order to allow themselves to participate. This model may not be true for all, but it seems to be true for me.

Provided that you are ok with it, I would enjoy simply letting it be what it is and to be able to enjoy and benefit from it without reservations or guilt. It is actually a very simple but powerful trade. I let you be in charge and give you control for awhile and in return I not only experience Nirvana but I come back not only safe and sound but also repaired and improved.

I enjoyed the N trigger and I really enjoy the concept of this trigger. If you are willing, I would love for some part of our next session to be used to strongly reinforce it. To establish the deep nirvanic letting go, to establish that it is ok for me to feel that way and to want to feel that way, that I can enthusiastically and fully immerse myself and participate, that you and B understand and accept being in charge and having that deep influence, and to establish that the nirvanic state can be reestablished by an compulsive trigger.


X Said:
I want you to know that I told B how I appreciated her openness to our very unorthodox therapeutic relationship. You have stumbled upon two women who are the least judgmental people you will ever want to meet. Although we recognize that what you are requesting is unusual, we also understand that you are getting profound benefits, and that is what it is all about for us. Also, FYI, there is probably a part of me that enjoys taking over the way you allow me. I'm pretty bossy naturally, and this is just one extra step. There is a certain allowing for me, too. It's strange, but it is not strange for me at all, anymore, to go that extra step. What does that say about me, I wonder? Nevertheless, and never fear, you are completely safe and it is not only okay, but highly desirable to me, that you fully and completely immerse yourself in the whole experience - without any reservations whatsoever. No guilt allowed, okay?

0 Comments:

Emailed Trigger

Received from "X"

And as you read this message you find yourself going into “[N trigger]" You will be in that state for two minutes, quietly enjoying the buzz, and then you may emerge, fully awake and aware, continuing to enjoy the benefits of your bliss.

Some effect the first time, but dangerous in both that it is the more trigger for the most deep trance and surrender, or at least it would be once strongly reinforced and that it does not take into account what my reading context might be. For example, being observed falling into trance at home or at the office could have ripple consequences. This breaks the rule of allowing anything as long as its impact outside the safety of the session is carefully controlled. If I have to worry about such impact then I would need to become guarded about what levels of influence I allow and I could not really draw a line about one level within a session and one outside – especially when there are attempts to extend it outside.

I find that in rereading I can simply skip my eyes past that key phrase. However, if I go back to reread it including the phrase, or read just the phrase I do get a definitive buzz.

0 Comments:

Two triggers for two levels -- Commentary

Regarding my wanting a trigger word. The cave and feelings of surrendering and letting go were profound and very relieving for me. I was wanting some way to get back to those feelings more quickly. Suggestions such as having the phrase “R” make me feel very relaxed are not the same because to me “relaxed” is not a good synonym for “hypnotized” and even “hypnotized” is a broad word that includes more range than just the profoundness of fully letting go, surrendering to the trance and to somebody’s influence, and letting yourself be guided and cared for by that person. I was seeking a word that meant this most deep state.

Background for B: (X is already used to this concept.) As this deeply surrendered state I have let go much of what makes a person a person such as planning, decision making, self-responsibility, and self observation and self-correction. What I get is blissful nirvanic selflessness. I found a description of a Buddhist site describing their goal of “reaching a state of absolute selflessness resulting in ultimate bliss called Nirvana”.

X has asked me on several times to recall the deepest I ever was and go back there, but each time I’ve pulled back because of lack of specific affirmation that it is ok to go there. (That she is telling me to go there does not seem to count, probably because I’m not sure that she intends where I’d be.) I’m not sure why I need the reaffirmations. It may be that I worry that such letting go will freak out the hypnotist so I need acknowledgement that they are ok with it. It may be that I mentally cannot give up these core things unless I know that somebody is actively ready to step in. Whatever the reason, I need some sort of explicit reaffirmation each time that it is ok to let go and surrender so fully and that my guide understands what is happening and is ready for their part.

The N trigger could become an interesting shortcut. Basically by using it either of you would be stating that you are ready to accept your side of the responsibility and active direction and that it is ok for me to let go of all of those things and place myself fully and completely into your influence. It would be great to be able to routinely get there, feel that release, and not feel like I have to apologize for being there or wanting to be there and not worry that my being that fully under your influence and direction will freak you out. The N trigger promises to be such a gateway, especially if reinforced.

0 Comments:

Clear Hypnotic Communications

There was some miss communication at one part probably caused both by my mumbling in trance and X’s words being obscured by the to me loud noise from B’s rubbing of the hair near my ears. I have a simple recommendation for such instances – just say it again or ask me to say it again. If I seem confused or in turmoil over something you said, it could be either that the suggestion impacted me in a way that causes turmoil, or it could be that I’m struggling to understand what you said, or that I’m wanting to comply but frustrated at not knowing what to comply with, or that I’m struggling to fit in what I mis-heard into the context of the session. If you are not expecting the suggestion to be one that causes a reaction and you see a reaction then just try again after making sure that all obstacles to my hearing you have been removed. This applies even if you did not notice anything that might have interfered with my comprehension because between the music, street sounds, table sounds (like the sheet or my hair), and my limited attention there are many ways I might miss something. It is only if you get the same reaction after being sure that I heard you that you have something to deal with. Even then it may be simply that you have to choose different words because I map the means differently than you intended.

Similarly, if I say something that seems odd or out of place, it may be that you misheard or it may be that I’m reacting to something I mis-heard or mis interpreted. You should probably ask for clarification and not be concerned that the odd reaction is indicative of any deeper issue.

0 Comments:

Differences with Two Hypnotists -- Commentary

In a pre-session email to X I raised some curiosities I would have about being hypnotized by two people at once (a first for me). Here are those questions and answers based on the last session.

would I feel doubly under,

No, but under twice, once for her once for X, toggling. Later merged

Was like a shifting of tracks

would her likely awkwardness in phrasing and less hypnotic self-confidence relative to you stand out,

She (B) spoke less and demanded less of me when she spoke.

Each touch relaxing .vs. each touch placing me deeper into hypnosis, deeper into surrender, deeper toward nirvana

Relax and hypnosis not the same for me

would I “feel” the same responding to her directions as I feel responding to yours,

Mostly yes, but responding to X is more intimate, maybe due to deeper bond from experience

would I have any sense of conflict for my attentions between the two of you,

No, you tag-teamed

Might be interesting if you did conflict on purpose with both of you demanding my attention – if your demands were toward the same end then no matter which one I pay attention to I get there, and if I pay attention to both I get there more thoroughly.

would I pay attention to any dialog between you two

There was some and I noticed it, but did not care. Also inaudible to me

would her words have the same powerful effect on me as do yours,

Probably, but she did not give specific commands

would I see her as your equal in influence or somehow subordinate to you

When receiving suggestions the comparison does not come up. When awake or in lighter trance X is stronger. I get a buzz from X, not from B

would I somehow resent her interruptions in the stream of narvanic bliss I having with you, etc.

No resentment

0 Comments:

Becoming an animal, going somewhere -- Commentary

I've never been so far gone that I truly perceived myself as being somewhere else or something else. (I'm low on the imaganary involvement scale.) X mentioned that she is not so sure that it can’t be done.

Well, you once had me out there with the bird for a very short time and this was a first for me. I do know that I had not fully surrendered to the hypnosis and your influence at that point and I do not know if this contributed to it not sticking.

I would be very surprised and pleasantly amazed if you managed to pull off a “become an animal” suggestion, a “be this other place” suggestion, or some other sort of be something different suggestion that became real to me. I would have said that it probably wasn’t going to ever happen, but you did pull off that bird thing even if only briefly.

Besides learning about myself, there are practical benefits. If you get so that you can influence and direct not just my behavior but my reality then you really could send me anywhere! Your use of this could range from simply pleasantly consume time while I am under to putting me through therapeutic scenarios.

0 Comments:

What is it with Triggers? -- Commentary

A funny thing happened on my way to the island. (Not really just on my way to the island, but it sounds cute). I kept listening and anticipating the use of the trigger “chair”. I know that the phrase has not been universally effective on me when awake, but when under the suggestion reasserted itself. The checking distracted from my full involvement in the imagery.

So what is it with triggers? It may simply be that they cannot be too common. The R trigger phrases do not come up in normal flow of conversation. When used they stand out and then their effects kick in. If you did try them where their use fit the flow of the conversation they might not work. Even so, such constructs will probably sound strange and this requires more mental processing of them and might give a greater chance for the trigger to be recognized.

Just “chair” is common and fits with normal conversation. Speech is processed and recognized by multiple complex brain processes and it may be that such a common phrase used naturally gets “handled” before getting to the part that responds to triggers. An analogy would be “sight words” in reading – for example nobody ever reads the word “the” as its components, it is recognized as a whole and processed as such. When “chair” came up in later conversation it was used in a naturally flowing and quick conversation and did not cause any impulse when used or a few seconds later when I noticed that it had been used.

A good trigger probably needs to be unmissable but this does not mean that it has to be obviously a trigger. Complex phrases, uncommon words, or unusual sights such as you holding a particular object would probably work. If you want immediate hypnotic and compulsive compliance you could try something semi-shocking like a chime or bell.

Post-hypnotic suggestions are interesting. It would be nice to try variants such as one that has me raising my arm and leaving it there until you touch it. If I have awake awareness of the arm being raised it would be interesting to see if I manage to lower it or if the power of the suggestion wins.

0 Comments:

Surrendering to Two hypnotists -- Log 6

Normal font holds my journal of what happened, colored fonts hold inserted discussions about some aspect. You should read just the black text the first time as the black reflect my original event and first impression log while the blue contains later thoughts about those events.


Greeted at door, B already inside

Walked to room, brief mention of buzz, comment from X that maybe I am already hypnotized
B wanted to know if we wanted privately, no
Given blanket, told to undress (awake) and cover

Saw all the bathroom, undressed to undies normally, covered with blanket,

sat on table

You probably missed a powerful hypnotic opportunity. You could induce a light trance and make the undressing a symbolic leaving my world and entering yours, that with each removal that I get more and more prepared to be profoundly immersed in the experiences of the session, that each step puts me deeper, etc. Similarly, redressing could be turned into a symbolic return to my normal world and even, if you so choose, a leaving of my hypnotic world, experiences, and memories behind until next time.

Discussed if B had read logs, she had

She was surprised at the memory, she thought all would be lost

I described that even if I got the main events, the relative level of details on them is much less than for normal memories

Discussed if I had any special needs, therapeutic etc. No Former employer less of an issue, and I had done well.

X mentioned my stutter, we discussed early speech impairment, more stuttering with family, not really an impediment

By the way, my stuttering, my frequent mispronunciation of the name of your dog, and my general lack of good dictation are all interrelated. My “speech” system is just not very good. As you might expect, I did terrible with the spoken parts of high school French even when I had become familiar enough with the language to be able to think in it. (No, my French is mostly gone – but feel free to try to recover it sometime.)

Discussed scars, in mid sentence

== Triggered ==

As usual it took effect before I was able to think about it, probably continued to talk as head slumped

By the time I start to think “was this the trigger, am I ready to go under?” my eyes are already closed, my facial muscles are relaxing, and I’m on my way out. Thinking back on it, it had to be humorous/entertaining to see me slump while still talking, and it is humorous to recall it. I would like to see a video of some of my reactions such as this one.

You, X, have clearly mastered the art of putting me under by surprise. Is it more effective when given by surprise? Probably “yes” because there would not be any of the mental defenses or reservations I might prep if I knew exactly when it was coming.

I’d be curious if B can do it as well. Separately I’d be curious if I could manage to not go under when triggered by X if I knew exactly when it was coming. This would not be a test of if I could be hypnotized against my will because I’m clearly showing up to be hypnotized and have no reasons for not going under except to run this experiment, but it would be a test of the degree to which my conscious thoughts just before being triggered affect my reactions.

I like the idea of an irresistible trigger for several reasons. First, it saves time and gives me more of the zoned out time I need. Second, it is very simple and this simplicity pre-empts my analysis – if I think of the trigger as being irresistible then I don’t spend time fretting about it or my reaction to it. Third, it acts as a relaxation hook I can use outside of sessions. By this I do not mean triggering myself (I can’t stay under by myself for more long), but just as I might reflect on some “hypnotized” behavior I had done and get a rush of relief, I can reflect that not only did I do/act/feel that way, but also that with a few simple words I might be doing so again.

Told to go deep as ever before
My deepest times were times when I had let go completely to the trance and guidance. I hadn’t been given permission to go this far and balked.

Basically, I can’t let go at some levels without knowing that somebody is there to take this responsibility for me that this seems to need an affirmative statement each time.

Some deepening phrases, some of which I repeated

B will tell me what to do, I will do whatever she says

I responded naturally to this with no resistance, questioning, or internal stress. Of course I entered the session with the expectation that B would be giving suggestions and it might not have been so easy to transfer influence to somebody I had not been expecting.

Lay on table face down.
Grabbed and settled on pillow naturally

I think that I am easier for you two to deal with when I’m face up and I know that you get more verbal and non-verbal feedback from me this way. One thing you might try might be a two-flip system where I start face up until my trance and nirvana are firmly established, then face down and later face up again. You can also use these times of transition for any walking-somumbalistic behaviors where you have me do something involving motion, eyes open, speaking, etc before having me settle back down. You know that if something you have me do does somehow wake me up or lessen the trance level you know that with a trigger and a little encouragement that I’d quickly be mentally back where you want me to be.


Guitar music, somewhat loud at times

B: Focus on touches, touches relaxing me, taking me deeper
Feelings of caring, love and compassion

To me, “relaxed” is not the same as hypnotized. It is ok to mix in phrases such as each touch hypnotizes me, or that each one builds my connection with you and my responsiveness to you

You can also get more creative with the combination of touches and suggestions. For example, you could use your touches to emphasize a word in a suggestion. “Each touch will take you DEEPER ”, or “You will FEEL cared for”. You can also try pure touch suggestions – I am after all in a very suggestible state. For example, you could try to impose arm rigidity by touch alone, or cause position and posture changes, or even a rollover, by touch alone.

Toggling between X and B, the voice of X sticks out in my mind better

Dream – island,

To ocean

Underwater

Island

A funny thing happened on my way to the island. (Not really just on my way to the island, but it sounds cute). I kept listening and anticipating the use of the trigger “chair”. I know that the phrase has not been universally effective on me when awake, but when under the suggestion reasserted itself. The checking distracted from my full involvement in the imagery.

Food – healthy

Cave, deeper and deeper – wanted to go, involved surrender, follow them, I will follow

Unique gift – never stated what it was, can be used only here, stays here, but impacts me forever

Nice touch


Several times before and after turn over some instruction was given firmly such as something to the effect that “As B pulls your arms you will … NOW”. I respond well to these.

This good response may be simply that such instructions grab my attention and are easy to understand. In contrast, some other instructions seem to be leading in a direction but did not quite get all the way there, acting as a hint. Completing such hints takes attention and these instructions often started well in my mind but ended up in conflict or confusion.


Turnover

Mouth ran with words related to letting go, surrendering

I seem to get chatty after the turnover. With your voice echoing around in my head it sometimes feels right to let it also echo out of my mouth and maybe by the time of the turnover I’ve built up some things to echo. It also may be that turnover ends the totally passive state and now that I’m using my muscle groups speech becomes possible.

Surrender
Firm words reinforcing surrender, compelled, eager, willing
Felt GOOD
Smile at release of control

These were very effective for me and enabled a different part of my mind to let go. While I had been relaxed before I became relaxed in new ways and became simply and profoundly involved in your words and the trance experience. I was no longer waiting for something else to happen and turned to simply experiencing.

With these words I felt lighter and released and I remember feeling like I was smiling at these feelings.


Arm stiff

Suggestions re food, taking care of self, ???


Asked for word

Confusion re hair

There was some miss communication at this part probably caused both by my mumbling in trance and X’s words being obscured by the to me loud noise from B’s rubbing of the hair near my ears.


Will return, sit up, etc – unclear if to dream or in person

When getting ready to wake up was sad for B

Wanted to give her a chance to question the hypnotized me about the experience, what I was feeling, how I might react, etc

There is a saying that asking questions is the best way to learn. I’m a bit unusual in that I can answer questions and remain under. You can use the time near the end of the trance to solicit feedback while I’m still in the mind set where I experienced the events about which you would be asking. You will have to supply the questions as I would be too mentally lazy to think of anything.

Imagery of returning to where we had started. Words toward end involved climbing on table and sitting up and I was getting confused between if I were to do these mentally only or physically – I almost started that final table climb and sitting up physically.


Awoke laying down

(When I review the black original area of the session log, I notice that I have many details about what we discussed and very few details about what happened in trance. I could probably spend much more time capturing what we discussed while awake and have to place a limit on that while I cannot or seem unwilling to capture more about what happened in trance. In contrast, I seem to have a high capacity to add blue commentary about what I did log.)


Felt light in body and lightheaded – some mental release had happened

Maybe impose this strongly at start of session


Discussion of surrender thing


Sat up

Dressed normally, hear discussion re ???? (I forgot), was going to comment on it)


What was I meaning re wanting a new word?

Reinforcement

Return to surrender .vs. less profound normal trance

Some flip back and forth between X and B on reinduction

One started phrase, other completed – no good

Somebody completed it – was later told that it was B, I did not notice at that time and still don’t remember it.

Deepening

N based now new phrase, to mean surrender

don’t think there was a third induction

Discussion as to there being two words

if it would work from street or if best used from trance

secret irresistible code to go to that very deep place

Discussion of stage hypnosis – chair, disappearing client, stuck in chair


Bird

Nefarious hypnosis

All h is self h, vs. can have extra influence. X is in camp that thinks people can have extra influence. (I can be a test subject for this but there would be questions if to if it applies when I’ve agreed to go deeply under).


Chicken, duck – my comment that it might be like dreams, that since I do not get all that involved in dreams that I might not get immersed in being an animal.

X mentioned that she is not so sure that it can’t be done

X mentioned video camera

I’d love to review a video of some of my reactions – you would choose which.

Comments re I’m happiest and least stressed when in complete surrender, I’m not filtering, wondering, planning, just waiting to be told what to do

Erickson

Pain, anesthesia, bruise discussion

Bruise that I did not feel

Normally I’m not at all into pain, but you have my permission to leave a small bruise if it helps in testing my responses – small bruises are not consequential, especially if I’m not feeling it when it happens

X made some comment about of B better not have more influence than X does. My comment: X has echoed in my head longer

Hmm, professional rivalry? X’s advantages are that she has the history with me and very rich and varied hypnotic skills. B’s advantages are being willing or able to use touch more aggressively than X can and touch can clearly grab attention. X clearly has the current advantage.

I encourage both of you to strive your hardest using any of your skill sets to establish a deep influence over me. I suspect that if there were any rivalry that I would be in for a pleasantly wild ride even while you two hone your talents.


Tell me what to feel


Log more of out discussions than the trance

X comments regarding being uncomfortable with my undress

B more comfortable with full clothing

From your comments I see that we are at the limits of your comfort zone. Undressing does cross a line that most hypnotists would never cross, but then most would not ever touch a patient just in case it gets misconstrued. I think the fear of things being misconstrued is probably the core issue. After all, if a man shows up at your house and strips it would normally be a sign of inappropriate intention and inappropriate expectations on his part.

Like so many other things it is a question of intent. I’m not intending anything inappropriate by such actions (if I’m even awake enough to have intentions), I have no inappropriate expectations, and I don’t think the undressing is a step toward any such things. Similarly, I don’t think that there is the remotest chance that you have any inappropriate intentions or that this undressing would lead to your having inappropriate intentions.

B is probably more used to walking this line. Massage professionals routinely deal with situations that in other circumstances could be misinterpreted. However with clear boundaries and proper intentions on all sides it does work out. Also, the risk of a misunderstanding is much less with a repeat client than with a first visit.

We can and should find ways to stay within your comfort zone and I’ll gladly follow any protocol X and B work out. I do hope that you know that I do not have any misconceptions about what the undressing means and what it does not mean.

On the humorous side, you do have an advantage most professional massage people would love to have. Not many have the ability to with a single word make a misbehaving client fall into a passive slumber from which they can be redirected.


Surrender means no choices for me to make, nothing for me to do – except to do what I am told.

Have to know someone is stepping up to take what I am letting go of, can’t just refer to a memory of when that happened.

0 Comments: