Signs of a Hypnotic Breakthrough
9/30/2005
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"My ears are all wet"
Hypnotic Surrender
Log of experiences during deep surrendered hypnosis. Describes the power or control transfer aspects of hypnosis.
This is a log between a client and their hypnotherapist. The client has a kink about surrendering in hypnosis and the relationship includes authoritarian hypnosis but recently migrated to a deeper and more ongoing surrender.
This log is rated PG but not R or X, sort of like the hypnosis relationship itself.
Read Who am I and then bottom up to get the full context.
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Blog Owner:
deeptrancer@yahoo.com
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mistressofrelaxation @ yahoo.com
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- My thoughts on Cary's The Gift
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- Trancing for its own sake
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Secret to Hypnotizing a Hypnotist
9/29/2005
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It seems that the secret to deeply hypnotizing a hypnotist is to have it done by somebody from which they are not expecting to learn.
At her shy and uncertain request, I hypnotized Goddess N very deeply today to address a specific blockage. It was a phenomenal session it was as measured by hypnotically enhanced progress, the sort of session you read about in books and articles touting the therapeutic value of hypnosis. We found a definitive main reason for the block, found the core association behind the reason, were able to take away that association, and we found an obvious in hindsight better way and integrated that. We also found ties to clear early and traumatic events and their not yet resolved aftershocks. We cried and shared.
Her mind was definitely "there" – the core association just hopped out and surprised her (and me). There is one big unresolved thing that is there and has been there for most of her life. We did not pursue it but she knows now that it can be opened and can move toward resolution.
Her memory of the experience is clearly partial and fragmented (I know the feeling) and she commented that she ceased to consciously listen at some points knowing things were ok. She also commented that she was more able to do this with me because she was not expecting to learn anything particular. I guess when a professional hypnotist hypnotizes another, the tranced one "keeps an eye open" so to speak to analyze and learn from the other's approach.
She still is my Mistress of Relaxation and I will still submit to her, this had nothing to do with that. Well, maybe I should say "almost nothing" because the way she looked at me at some points after the trance seemed to be a reevaluation, a "Wow! He helped me do that?" so that knowledge will be with her in all of her dealings with me and she will be more aware of the possibility he her trancing. From my side, I'll still eagerly submit and let go, maybe even more so than before because our already deep bond is a bit deeper. When she is ready she will tell me, just as she did today.
At her shy and uncertain request, I hypnotized Goddess N very deeply today to address a specific blockage. It was a phenomenal session it was as measured by hypnotically enhanced progress, the sort of session you read about in books and articles touting the therapeutic value of hypnosis. We found a definitive main reason for the block, found the core association behind the reason, were able to take away that association, and we found an obvious in hindsight better way and integrated that. We also found ties to clear early and traumatic events and their not yet resolved aftershocks. We cried and shared.
Her mind was definitely "there" – the core association just hopped out and surprised her (and me). There is one big unresolved thing that is there and has been there for most of her life. We did not pursue it but she knows now that it can be opened and can move toward resolution.
Her memory of the experience is clearly partial and fragmented (I know the feeling) and she commented that she ceased to consciously listen at some points knowing things were ok. She also commented that she was more able to do this with me because she was not expecting to learn anything particular. I guess when a professional hypnotist hypnotizes another, the tranced one "keeps an eye open" so to speak to analyze and learn from the other's approach.
She still is my Mistress of Relaxation and I will still submit to her, this had nothing to do with that. Well, maybe I should say "almost nothing" because the way she looked at me at some points after the trance seemed to be a reevaluation, a "Wow! He helped me do that?" so that knowledge will be with her in all of her dealings with me and she will be more aware of the possibility he her trancing. From my side, I'll still eagerly submit and let go, maybe even more so than before because our already deep bond is a bit deeper. When she is ready she will tell me, just as she did today.
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Listening to Stories
9/28/2005
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Goddess X and I had a session where I mostly listened to stories/fables with hypnotic embedded suggestions. I faded in and out to the stories, and don't really know if they have had any effect on me, but it was a pleasant experience.
We did plan a surprize for Goddess N -- but not as big as what actually happened the next day.
I might add more to this entry, but maybe not.
We did plan a surprize for Goddess N -- but not as big as what actually happened the next day.
I might add more to this entry, but maybe not.
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Reading Stories
9/27/2005
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I had a fairly typical session with Goddess B Monday. These follow a generally massage pattern with a few hypnotic activities thrown in. This time it was preparing her recreational drug of choice -- frozen grapes, and later reading Mother Goose stories.
In a post session conversation, Goddess B did confess that she had not noticed that the other Goddesses had involved me with their feet and that she was surprised to see that she was following a path others had followed.
I'm somewhat surprized to discover that there is any common path at all because this is new ground for all of us. A regular guy with a submissive streak gets a regular hypnotherapist involved, then a massage therapist, then more hypnotherapists, then gets into Mistress and Goddessy stuff, when it is the first for each of us. Commonalities can be coincidence, can be some form of feedback between us, or might reflect some path that is part of the general human makeup in these situations. So if there is a path, where does it go?
I'm thinking of the end of the movie "Pleasantville" where the newly emotionally liberated wife is sitting between her husband and lover, both also newly emotionally liberated to different degrees, and one asks "where do we go from here" and none of them know.
I don't know where it goes from here, but I don't spend any time thinking about it either. Life is about the journey, not the destination and we are on an interesting journey.
In a post session conversation, Goddess B did confess that she had not noticed that the other Goddesses had involved me with their feet and that she was surprised to see that she was following a path others had followed.
I'm somewhat surprized to discover that there is any common path at all because this is new ground for all of us. A regular guy with a submissive streak gets a regular hypnotherapist involved, then a massage therapist, then more hypnotherapists, then gets into Mistress and Goddessy stuff, when it is the first for each of us. Commonalities can be coincidence, can be some form of feedback between us, or might reflect some path that is part of the general human makeup in these situations. So if there is a path, where does it go?
I'm thinking of the end of the movie "Pleasantville" where the newly emotionally liberated wife is sitting between her husband and lover, both also newly emotionally liberated to different degrees, and one asks "where do we go from here" and none of them know.
I don't know where it goes from here, but I don't spend any time thinking about it either. Life is about the journey, not the destination and we are on an interesting journey.
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The Nature Goddess
9/26/2005
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Goddess N was already in her studio when I arrived which surprised me as I had not noticed her car. I guess she has been pondering that awkward transition I tease her about that occurs when we discuss business at length before trancing because she tranced me within a minute of my arrival. As she probably expected, there was no awkward transition.
The focus was on going deeper, listening to her voice, and submitting totally.
She prepared me to follow her to her car for a long ride. After putting me in the car she had to go away for a few minutes and during this time I heard noises behind me which I quickly categorized as most likely being that of a small dog. The car ride went much as the previous one where I just reclined in the car with my eyes closed and with an occasional touch or word from her while in transit. As before, I was not bothered by the car's motion or the various noises of traffic and any noises the dog might have made were lost in the environmental noises or were not picked up by me as anything significant.
When she got me out we were in a nature park setting where the park was clearly at the end of one season and preparing for the next. The introduced me to her dog who, unlike Goddess X's dog, did not consider me to be of any particular relevance. We walked along the outer edges of the park (it was probably unclear how welcoming the park was to the dog) and she would at various times have me stop, turn in some particular direction, and admire a scene, a body of water, or a passing animal. Somewhere in here I got one of "those" smiles that generally indicates some sort of surprise for the Goddess and in this case it was that I had very recently taken and posted a series of pictures of almost identical content to what she was directing my attention. On the way back to the car she asked me to share my thoughts and I at least partially articulated this.
Somewhere along the walk she had me stop and notice the small densely clustered not yet open flowers of an abundant plant. She had me tear off and carry a small cluster from it and later gave me suggestions that it would remind me of her and of the calmness of the nature environment. I happened to notice this cluster again today and found it dry and withered, but the previously unopened flowers had all opened and released their pollen, giving all they had in a last oomph before wilting.
Back in her studio she had me physically relax and played a bit with chair switching, having me sit in her chair and then wanting to go back into "my" chair that was then occupied by her.
She requested two specific emails from me to be sent later. I was paying attention at the time, but I was also not paying attention in that way that makes sense only to those who understand hypnosis. What I find is that in the fuzziness of the session that I lose specific details. I know there is a second email, but I've forgotten what it is supposed to be.
She woke me up and I mentioned my set of recent similar pictures. We browsed them and then discussed various things related to the business thing whose trigger had been pulled the last week. I was then on my way.
By the way, Goddess N sometimes frets if the blog entry is delayed after the session. In my last entry I shared the email where she described herself as being sooooo tranced out and since then I've seen several other indications that that session truly is fuzzy in her recollections. Interestingly, in this fuzziness, she missed my blog entry about that session and today questioned me why I hadn't made one. I understand the feeling – when something is shrouded in hypno fuzz things that "attach" to it mentally either partially unfuzz it or they themselves get partially fuzzed. Forgetting to notice the blog entry, even when anticipating it, goes along with forgetting details of the session. I have several strong reasons to conclude that she really was "sooooooooo tranced out" during that session and this is odd because she showed less signs of obvious trance than she has done in numerous other sessions and there was no part of it where she was relaxing or being passive. She fully tranced out trancing me and enjoying my submission. Those who wonder if the Goddesses are really "into it" can read this as an affirmation but must remember that what "it" is that they are into is dependent on their history and disposition and might not be the "it" of anybody else's imagination.
By the way #2: Goddess N probably dislikes blog entry's title becuse it is too close to the earth mother stuff that is not her, but it fun to use it for a day or so.
The focus was on going deeper, listening to her voice, and submitting totally.
She prepared me to follow her to her car for a long ride. After putting me in the car she had to go away for a few minutes and during this time I heard noises behind me which I quickly categorized as most likely being that of a small dog. The car ride went much as the previous one where I just reclined in the car with my eyes closed and with an occasional touch or word from her while in transit. As before, I was not bothered by the car's motion or the various noises of traffic and any noises the dog might have made were lost in the environmental noises or were not picked up by me as anything significant.
When she got me out we were in a nature park setting where the park was clearly at the end of one season and preparing for the next. The introduced me to her dog who, unlike Goddess X's dog, did not consider me to be of any particular relevance. We walked along the outer edges of the park (it was probably unclear how welcoming the park was to the dog) and she would at various times have me stop, turn in some particular direction, and admire a scene, a body of water, or a passing animal. Somewhere in here I got one of "those" smiles that generally indicates some sort of surprise for the Goddess and in this case it was that I had very recently taken and posted a series of pictures of almost identical content to what she was directing my attention. On the way back to the car she asked me to share my thoughts and I at least partially articulated this.
Somewhere along the walk she had me stop and notice the small densely clustered not yet open flowers of an abundant plant. She had me tear off and carry a small cluster from it and later gave me suggestions that it would remind me of her and of the calmness of the nature environment. I happened to notice this cluster again today and found it dry and withered, but the previously unopened flowers had all opened and released their pollen, giving all they had in a last oomph before wilting.
Back in her studio she had me physically relax and played a bit with chair switching, having me sit in her chair and then wanting to go back into "my" chair that was then occupied by her.
She requested two specific emails from me to be sent later. I was paying attention at the time, but I was also not paying attention in that way that makes sense only to those who understand hypnosis. What I find is that in the fuzziness of the session that I lose specific details. I know there is a second email, but I've forgotten what it is supposed to be.
She woke me up and I mentioned my set of recent similar pictures. We browsed them and then discussed various things related to the business thing whose trigger had been pulled the last week. I was then on my way.
By the way, Goddess N sometimes frets if the blog entry is delayed after the session. In my last entry I shared the email where she described herself as being sooooo tranced out and since then I've seen several other indications that that session truly is fuzzy in her recollections. Interestingly, in this fuzziness, she missed my blog entry about that session and today questioned me why I hadn't made one. I understand the feeling – when something is shrouded in hypno fuzz things that "attach" to it mentally either partially unfuzz it or they themselves get partially fuzzed. Forgetting to notice the blog entry, even when anticipating it, goes along with forgetting details of the session. I have several strong reasons to conclude that she really was "sooooooooo tranced out" during that session and this is odd because she showed less signs of obvious trance than she has done in numerous other sessions and there was no part of it where she was relaxing or being passive. She fully tranced out trancing me and enjoying my submission. Those who wonder if the Goddesses are really "into it" can read this as an affirmation but must remember that what "it" is that they are into is dependent on their history and disposition and might not be the "it" of anybody else's imagination.
By the way #2: Goddess N probably dislikes blog entry's title becuse it is too close to the earth mother stuff that is not her, but it fun to use it for a day or so.
Defeets of the Goddesses
9/25/2005
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My session with Goddess B started with a brief discussion about garden insect pest control before she used several triggers on me in her atrium. I was lead to the massage room and given the usual instructions to prepare while going deeper and to call her when ready.
Her induction and enchantment was her normal stuff with extra emphasis on surrendering everything and being in her complete control. I was more receptive to this than I have been in the last few sessions and more willing or able to just zone out.
She had me sleepwalking and going to a dresser and help her wind threads onto spools. This I did unquestioningly and without paying much attention to my involvement in doing it.
Back on the table I eventually entered that state where I echo most of her suggestions. This seems to form some sort of reinforcement cycle where she feeds back to me that which is most effective.
What is it with feet? Somewhere after turnover she had me up and applying lotion to her feet and massaging them. I did this with the same narrowness of focus I often have with Goddess N where I was aware of 1 foot and some of the ankle and not of the other foot or the rest of her or even of her reactions. What I am curious about is whether she came to this spontaneously or if she was inspired by the events with my other Goddesses. I know that they talk, but I know that it is not that common and mostly they have things in common to talk about that are not related to me, and I know that she reads my blog entries related to her but does not as often read the blog entries from the sessions of the others. I don't mind massaging the feet and it is sometimes pleasant, but I am starting to wonder if foot massages are some inevitable milestone in the path of the development of a Goddess.
Somewhere between halfway and three quarters into the session somebody was calling to her from outside the room. She did not respond to these and continued as if they were not occurring. I trusted her to do whatever was appropriate in reaction to the calls and did not concern myself as to what that might be.
Her induction and enchantment was her normal stuff with extra emphasis on surrendering everything and being in her complete control. I was more receptive to this than I have been in the last few sessions and more willing or able to just zone out.
She had me sleepwalking and going to a dresser and help her wind threads onto spools. This I did unquestioningly and without paying much attention to my involvement in doing it.
Back on the table I eventually entered that state where I echo most of her suggestions. This seems to form some sort of reinforcement cycle where she feeds back to me that which is most effective.
What is it with feet? Somewhere after turnover she had me up and applying lotion to her feet and massaging them. I did this with the same narrowness of focus I often have with Goddess N where I was aware of 1 foot and some of the ankle and not of the other foot or the rest of her or even of her reactions. What I am curious about is whether she came to this spontaneously or if she was inspired by the events with my other Goddesses. I know that they talk, but I know that it is not that common and mostly they have things in common to talk about that are not related to me, and I know that she reads my blog entries related to her but does not as often read the blog entries from the sessions of the others. I don't mind massaging the feet and it is sometimes pleasant, but I am starting to wonder if foot massages are some inevitable milestone in the path of the development of a Goddess.
Somewhere between halfway and three quarters into the session somebody was calling to her from outside the room. She did not respond to these and continued as if they were not occurring. I trusted her to do whatever was appropriate in reaction to the calls and did not concern myself as to what that might be.
2 Comments:
-
said...
-
Dear DT,
I am still smiling and laughing as I write this entry! You are right, what is IT with feet? The ultimate act of submitting to your mistress? Something to ponder and ponder.
N -
Deep Trancer said...
-
It needs to be remembered that the feet thing comes from the Mistresses, not from me. (I don’t have any particular interest in feet.) So the perception of it being an act of submitting must reside in them. It could be seen as an extension of kneeling, but in this particular case with Goddess B she was on the table and I was standing.
I think it is probably something more profound in a way that puts it definitely on the path to becoming a Goddess. I think it represents the Goddesses become confident in their influence, confident enough to overtly direct attention to one of their needs. It might mark a step beyond enjoying the submission mostly for its potential.
This may seem odd to some readers, but it is not odd when you remember that I am the first submissive for all of my Mistresses, that all of them have other roles they follow with everybody else. They are not used to being clearly in unquestioned control and are not used to using this control or even to thinking of how it might be used.
I doubt that the feet thing is the 'ultimate' anything, it may be more the first step down a new path. We are all still learning where this might go.
--
Ok, now you have more to ponder, my Goddess.
Illuminating the Goddess
9/25/2005
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As I approached the lobby of Goddess X's place of business I noticed a note addressed to me by name that told me directly into her studio and to close the door. Once in there I found Goddess X passively laying on the table eyes closed and a note in the reclining chair to close the blinds, press "play", listen, and then proceed with hypnotizing her.
Yep, I said "hypnotizing her". It is actually my second experience where I am the sole hypnotist – I had hypnotized her once in conjunction with Goddess N and once before in a session I had not blogged.
When I am hypnotizing someone I dedicate myself to their agenda so of course I needed to know what she was wanting or needing this time. We do not talk as much as we once did mainly because taking over the world is hard work and reduces the opportunities for casual chats. However, I had a pretty good idea and knew that I would get the rest from her if appropriate.
Without addressing her I looked around for which "play" button to press. Perhaps it was her mini recorder, perhaps it was that one that uses a mechanical motor, or perhaps it was her multi-function boom box. Her studio is neat but busy in that there are decorations and interesting things on just about every surface so it would be easy for a recorder to be nesting and overlooked. I searched without touching anything before proceeding to her boom box. It had a tape and a CD – which to play? Don't you hate those stylish but cryptic unlabeled buttons some devices have? I tried the tape first and ended up forwarding it (or rewinding?) before landing on what seemed to be the play button. Hmm, no sound. So I hunted forward and back on the tape a bit – still no sound.
If this sounds a bit fumbly it is because it was. There seems to be something about her studio that makes electronic devices uncooperative. As I was searching for the recording Goddess X bought herself out of trance so she could find out what was wrong. I was disturbed that her plan and preparation was not working as expected and that whatever mental state she had achieved had been put aside, at least temporarily, due to these problems. Well, it didn’t make a sound for her either.
We laughed about it a bit and she popped into another room and told me it might take 3 minutes. While waiting we talked about whether I had been wanting to do this and if I wanted to hypnotize Goddess N. We also clarified her agenda a bit and she discussed a new business insight she was considering. From the next room came one of those Microsoft windows chimes that indicated the end of burning a CD. We chatted more about some business ideas and some opposition she had recently encountered. She then popped the CD in, verbally instructed me to listen to the first track and then to proceed with her.
It was another one of her therapeutic recordings (not submissively charged). She is good, and so are her recordings. The induction was a subtle progressive relaxation along with focus on internal body sensations and breathing and implanted a reinduction trigger to be used on oneself. The core message in the recording was supportive of daily achieving your goals. The recording ended with a choice of drifting off to sleep or awakening. I arose to cut off the tape as it got to the details of awakening. I was admiring her hypnosis skill set as expressed in how her voice tones and volume changed over the course of the recording to match the desired reaction.
Milton Erickson was a big advocate of using whatever was situationally available, either concepts the tranced one had brought with them or things from the environment, as the basis on which to build the trance magic. Well, the recording we both had just listened to gave me some of these. I told Goddess X that it was time to relax and I used the trigger from the tape a few times interwoven into the conversation but emphasized. Also following the lines of the tape I had her be aware of body sensations, particularly that of gravity pulling her down into the table.
Working spontaneously and without much time to prepare, I built on the theme of achieving her goals and wove into it two analogies, that of traveling and one involving a gem. At the summit of both analogies was a connection between them, where the two together was much more than either alone. I was thinking that I was either being excellently clever, or that I was involving too many things. As it wrapped up she moved her hand outward and I took hold of it to build on that bond of ours, to let her feel the confidence I have in her, to feel the energy in that connection, and to be jazzed up from it. She became verbal and asked me about something. Aaagh, I was caught, because what she had asked about was a place where I took a small change in focus and I knew at the time that I had done that with a seam in the transition. Well, I had wanted to not be too specific because her mind would fill it in as it needed to be, but I had shifted a bit so I clarified it.
The trance ended without any formal transition. The nature of suggestion is cumulative and trances are not the only place it occurs, so I made sure that I stayed on target in all of my statements. This included discussing the analogies used (and in so doing emphasizing the important points) and sharing a true store from my personal experience that paralleled the core point.
Nowhere in here was there any mention of surrender, submission, or control. These were not relevant to what she needed and I did not even think about it at the time. This was not a "you are in my control" sort of trance, it was a "lets look with new clarity at what you already know" sort of trance.
I called her two days later on another issue and at the end she told me that some magical effects may be happening and that she would tell me later. I want to know!
Yep, I said "hypnotizing her". It is actually my second experience where I am the sole hypnotist – I had hypnotized her once in conjunction with Goddess N and once before in a session I had not blogged.
When I am hypnotizing someone I dedicate myself to their agenda so of course I needed to know what she was wanting or needing this time. We do not talk as much as we once did mainly because taking over the world is hard work and reduces the opportunities for casual chats. However, I had a pretty good idea and knew that I would get the rest from her if appropriate.
Without addressing her I looked around for which "play" button to press. Perhaps it was her mini recorder, perhaps it was that one that uses a mechanical motor, or perhaps it was her multi-function boom box. Her studio is neat but busy in that there are decorations and interesting things on just about every surface so it would be easy for a recorder to be nesting and overlooked. I searched without touching anything before proceeding to her boom box. It had a tape and a CD – which to play? Don't you hate those stylish but cryptic unlabeled buttons some devices have? I tried the tape first and ended up forwarding it (or rewinding?) before landing on what seemed to be the play button. Hmm, no sound. So I hunted forward and back on the tape a bit – still no sound.
If this sounds a bit fumbly it is because it was. There seems to be something about her studio that makes electronic devices uncooperative. As I was searching for the recording Goddess X bought herself out of trance so she could find out what was wrong. I was disturbed that her plan and preparation was not working as expected and that whatever mental state she had achieved had been put aside, at least temporarily, due to these problems. Well, it didn’t make a sound for her either.
We laughed about it a bit and she popped into another room and told me it might take 3 minutes. While waiting we talked about whether I had been wanting to do this and if I wanted to hypnotize Goddess N. We also clarified her agenda a bit and she discussed a new business insight she was considering. From the next room came one of those Microsoft windows chimes that indicated the end of burning a CD. We chatted more about some business ideas and some opposition she had recently encountered. She then popped the CD in, verbally instructed me to listen to the first track and then to proceed with her.
It was another one of her therapeutic recordings (not submissively charged). She is good, and so are her recordings. The induction was a subtle progressive relaxation along with focus on internal body sensations and breathing and implanted a reinduction trigger to be used on oneself. The core message in the recording was supportive of daily achieving your goals. The recording ended with a choice of drifting off to sleep or awakening. I arose to cut off the tape as it got to the details of awakening. I was admiring her hypnosis skill set as expressed in how her voice tones and volume changed over the course of the recording to match the desired reaction.
Milton Erickson was a big advocate of using whatever was situationally available, either concepts the tranced one had brought with them or things from the environment, as the basis on which to build the trance magic. Well, the recording we both had just listened to gave me some of these. I told Goddess X that it was time to relax and I used the trigger from the tape a few times interwoven into the conversation but emphasized. Also following the lines of the tape I had her be aware of body sensations, particularly that of gravity pulling her down into the table.
Working spontaneously and without much time to prepare, I built on the theme of achieving her goals and wove into it two analogies, that of traveling and one involving a gem. At the summit of both analogies was a connection between them, where the two together was much more than either alone. I was thinking that I was either being excellently clever, or that I was involving too many things. As it wrapped up she moved her hand outward and I took hold of it to build on that bond of ours, to let her feel the confidence I have in her, to feel the energy in that connection, and to be jazzed up from it. She became verbal and asked me about something. Aaagh, I was caught, because what she had asked about was a place where I took a small change in focus and I knew at the time that I had done that with a seam in the transition. Well, I had wanted to not be too specific because her mind would fill it in as it needed to be, but I had shifted a bit so I clarified it.
The trance ended without any formal transition. The nature of suggestion is cumulative and trances are not the only place it occurs, so I made sure that I stayed on target in all of my statements. This included discussing the analogies used (and in so doing emphasizing the important points) and sharing a true store from my personal experience that paralleled the core point.
Nowhere in here was there any mention of surrender, submission, or control. These were not relevant to what she needed and I did not even think about it at the time. This was not a "you are in my control" sort of trance, it was a "lets look with new clarity at what you already know" sort of trance.
I called her two days later on another issue and at the end she told me that some magical effects may be happening and that she would tell me later. I want to know!
0 Comments:
The Forgotten Session
9/20/2005
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Goddess N had warned me that our session might start late as she had a new client just before me. I arrived at her studio and could hear her voice (but not her words) through her closed door, so I waited about 15 minutes until she completed. I took an unobtrusive look at her other client but I doubt that they noticed me. The client seemed radiant, almost beaming, and lighthearted and they thanked our mutual hypnotist several times in their short walk out and promised to follow though. I have no idea what the purpose of this session had been, but it had clearly been successful.
Goddess N had had a busy day it seems. I knew that she had earlier in the day had a telephone session with someone who contacted her through the blog. This person had also contacted me with several direct questions about her and her sessions, all of which I answered to the best of my abilities. I later got a follow up email from him and he gave permission for me to discuss his session with Goddess N so I know that his session was effective. At his request the session had been about a non-submissive specific therapeutic goal but basically by accident there was in the session a small amount of more submission inducing suggestions to which he seemed to resonate. It will be interesting to see if he chooses to have more of that included in his next session.
I'm feeling some satisfaction from helping him and the Goddess find each other. One thing about this blog is that it gives a feel of the interactions and should attract those seeking similar experiences.
Back to back to back (to back?) sessions must take a toll, especially when she has such a tendency to trance out in mine (while retaining control, most of the time). It is odd that I did not think of her as trancing out that much this time, but an email I received 4 days later told the story as she said:
Subject: sooooo tranced out
Dear DT,
Was it you or I that were so tranced out that our session on the 15th did not seem as if it happened? Where is the post? I know I received some emails as directed from you!
N
You were busy that day, my dear Goddess, and that day was sandwiched between other busy days, so let me see if I can fill in things with this post.
We had our usual problem of enjoying talking to each other such that it becomes awkward for her to start the transition into trance. The "ideal" trancy thing might be to enter a room already set to the proper atmosphere and for her to start the trance right away, but we always seem to get involved in discussions first. I enjoy these discussions and I have to admit enjoy the tease of watching her make the transition. This day in particular we had things to discuss as we made the final decision to "pull the trigger" on the final step of a business thing we have been pursuing for several months. She is less colorful than I had thought she was. (Inside joke.)
This time we discussed the awkwardness and laughed about it a bit and then fell into more discussions. It was probably 20 minutes into the session before we got down to hypnotic fun.
"OK, take a deep breath", …take another deep breath, keep on staring at my eyes, going deeper and deeper, Deeper, concentrating, hearing, deeper, following my instructions, deeper, going into trance easily, deeper, effortlessly, deeper, … Those are probably not the exact words, but they give the feel.
"as you go deeper, needing to follow my instructions, all sounds put you deeper and deeper. I am your Mistress, you submit to me now, following my instructions, going deeper still, more and more relaxed …"
"In moment we will go outside, you will stay deeply in trance …as you walk you will go deeper and deeper into trance, … you will be aware but not bothered by things around you, … what will matter is that you will be with your Mistress … totally submitting, following her instructions …"
At her count, I stood up and followed her outside to start our walk. We passed movie theaters, insurance agents, real estate offices, white cloth and junk food places, but none of this mattered, she mattered. Just as we got out of the congested area she decided to start back.
With hardly no time back in the chair she had me open my eyes to take and heat her lunch in the communal microwave, still in trance. Well, in the kitchen was a massage therapist transferring lotions and such. She was friendly and tried several times to start a small conversation and I, in trance, was a bit of a humbug. She wasn't interesting to my goal at that time (heat the lunch) and interactions were a threat to my direction to keep my trance unobserved. I wondered if she noticed anything?
Back in the room she put the lunch aside to cool and immediately pulled out a nail file and instructed me to do her nails. "Each time that file goes back and forth you go deeper, Each time that file goes back and forth you need to go deeper, going deeper and deeper, submitting to me, … needing to submit, wanting to submit, … you are under my control, wanting to please me, needing to please me, in my total control, … allow yourself to totally focus … on pleasing me …"
"Now with your eyes closed I want you to feel the sensations as I file your nails" … She proceeded to play a bit with limb catalepsy, enjoying having even my fingers in her control, directing my focus to the sensations.
She had me get up and straighten the bed/table whose sheets had been disrupted by the prior client. This included fetching and replacing the head cover. I think I did ok, but things are fuzzy in trance. She said I had done a good job.
She had me look into a box with several varieties of tea bags in it and tell her what was available. She tried with limited success to suggest that I would find a different variety when I checked again. She had me ask her what she would like. "Which one would you like" Mistress! "Which one would you like, Mistress?" … "Yes Mistress"
Time to fetch the tea, and time to trance as I dip the bag and she counted.
Eyes back closed, repeating what she said. "I am Deep Trancer, please take me deeper. I want to please you, I desire to please you, I need to pleas you, I am your submissive one …"
At one point she tried to have me sing in trance – that just seems to be impossible for me. We settled for a mantra of my repeating phrases such as those used above. My voice can be soft and is a tone that blends into the background, so she leaned forward to listen. I watched her enjoyment at hearing these words and her being pleased pleased me.
"Go deep, very very deep, deeper than ever before …"
She gave me instructions to send several specific emails over the next 2 days basically confirming that I was in her control. I sent at least some of these, but we probably exchanged 30 emails related to that business thing (where I was in control) and the frequency of these probably interfered with some of the suggested emails.
"6 … 8 … 10, opening your eyes …"
We chatted, discussion whether I had benefited from her earlier session – if she had some pent up controlling urges. She analyzes things as they happen (intuitively). That some people just could not ever understand. We also discussed the role of control and submission her unusual former profession (unusual, but totally vanilla). It would be very interesting (but probably unbloggable) if her former profession ever crossed over into our sessions. I can still cause a flush in her with a well timed "Mistress".
She is very good at what she does, VERY good, and has even been able to use it in lifesaving roles. I'm lucky to have found her.
Thank you, Goddess N
Thank you, Goddess X, my gatekeeper of all things hypnotic, for causing this to happen on top of our own interactions.
Goddess N had had a busy day it seems. I knew that she had earlier in the day had a telephone session with someone who contacted her through the blog. This person had also contacted me with several direct questions about her and her sessions, all of which I answered to the best of my abilities. I later got a follow up email from him and he gave permission for me to discuss his session with Goddess N so I know that his session was effective. At his request the session had been about a non-submissive specific therapeutic goal but basically by accident there was in the session a small amount of more submission inducing suggestions to which he seemed to resonate. It will be interesting to see if he chooses to have more of that included in his next session.
I'm feeling some satisfaction from helping him and the Goddess find each other. One thing about this blog is that it gives a feel of the interactions and should attract those seeking similar experiences.
Back to back to back (to back?) sessions must take a toll, especially when she has such a tendency to trance out in mine (while retaining control, most of the time). It is odd that I did not think of her as trancing out that much this time, but an email I received 4 days later told the story as she said:
Subject: sooooo tranced out
Dear DT,
Was it you or I that were so tranced out that our session on the 15th did not seem as if it happened? Where is the post? I know I received some emails as directed from you!
N
You were busy that day, my dear Goddess, and that day was sandwiched between other busy days, so let me see if I can fill in things with this post.
We had our usual problem of enjoying talking to each other such that it becomes awkward for her to start the transition into trance. The "ideal" trancy thing might be to enter a room already set to the proper atmosphere and for her to start the trance right away, but we always seem to get involved in discussions first. I enjoy these discussions and I have to admit enjoy the tease of watching her make the transition. This day in particular we had things to discuss as we made the final decision to "pull the trigger" on the final step of a business thing we have been pursuing for several months. She is less colorful than I had thought she was. (Inside joke.)
This time we discussed the awkwardness and laughed about it a bit and then fell into more discussions. It was probably 20 minutes into the session before we got down to hypnotic fun.
"OK, take a deep breath", …take another deep breath, keep on staring at my eyes, going deeper and deeper, Deeper, concentrating, hearing, deeper, following my instructions, deeper, going into trance easily, deeper, effortlessly, deeper, … Those are probably not the exact words, but they give the feel.
"as you go deeper, needing to follow my instructions, all sounds put you deeper and deeper. I am your Mistress, you submit to me now, following my instructions, going deeper still, more and more relaxed …"
"In moment we will go outside, you will stay deeply in trance …as you walk you will go deeper and deeper into trance, … you will be aware but not bothered by things around you, … what will matter is that you will be with your Mistress … totally submitting, following her instructions …"
At her count, I stood up and followed her outside to start our walk. We passed movie theaters, insurance agents, real estate offices, white cloth and junk food places, but none of this mattered, she mattered. Just as we got out of the congested area she decided to start back.
With hardly no time back in the chair she had me open my eyes to take and heat her lunch in the communal microwave, still in trance. Well, in the kitchen was a massage therapist transferring lotions and such. She was friendly and tried several times to start a small conversation and I, in trance, was a bit of a humbug. She wasn't interesting to my goal at that time (heat the lunch) and interactions were a threat to my direction to keep my trance unobserved. I wondered if she noticed anything?
Back in the room she put the lunch aside to cool and immediately pulled out a nail file and instructed me to do her nails. "Each time that file goes back and forth you go deeper, Each time that file goes back and forth you need to go deeper, going deeper and deeper, submitting to me, … needing to submit, wanting to submit, … you are under my control, wanting to please me, needing to please me, in my total control, … allow yourself to totally focus … on pleasing me …"
"Now with your eyes closed I want you to feel the sensations as I file your nails" … She proceeded to play a bit with limb catalepsy, enjoying having even my fingers in her control, directing my focus to the sensations.
She had me get up and straighten the bed/table whose sheets had been disrupted by the prior client. This included fetching and replacing the head cover. I think I did ok, but things are fuzzy in trance. She said I had done a good job.
She had me look into a box with several varieties of tea bags in it and tell her what was available. She tried with limited success to suggest that I would find a different variety when I checked again. She had me ask her what she would like. "Which one would you like" Mistress! "Which one would you like, Mistress?" … "Yes Mistress"
Time to fetch the tea, and time to trance as I dip the bag and she counted.
Eyes back closed, repeating what she said. "I am Deep Trancer, please take me deeper. I want to please you, I desire to please you, I need to pleas you, I am your submissive one …"
At one point she tried to have me sing in trance – that just seems to be impossible for me. We settled for a mantra of my repeating phrases such as those used above. My voice can be soft and is a tone that blends into the background, so she leaned forward to listen. I watched her enjoyment at hearing these words and her being pleased pleased me.
"Go deep, very very deep, deeper than ever before …"
She gave me instructions to send several specific emails over the next 2 days basically confirming that I was in her control. I sent at least some of these, but we probably exchanged 30 emails related to that business thing (where I was in control) and the frequency of these probably interfered with some of the suggested emails.
"6 … 8 … 10, opening your eyes …"
We chatted, discussion whether I had benefited from her earlier session – if she had some pent up controlling urges. She analyzes things as they happen (intuitively). That some people just could not ever understand. We also discussed the role of control and submission her unusual former profession (unusual, but totally vanilla). It would be very interesting (but probably unbloggable) if her former profession ever crossed over into our sessions. I can still cause a flush in her with a well timed "Mistress".
She is very good at what she does, VERY good, and has even been able to use it in lifesaving roles. I'm lucky to have found her.
Thank you, Goddess N
Thank you, Goddess X, my gatekeeper of all things hypnotic, for causing this to happen on top of our own interactions.
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Reviewing Trances
9/19/2005
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Had a pleasant session with Goddess X.
After a small bit of greeting we entered her studio and she tranced me reclining in that chair of hers. She then asked if I would do something different that day. Well, of course I am always intrigued. The something different was that she had me listen to one of her recorded CDs so I could create a write up about it from a fresh prospective. The CD was related to a non-hypno submission sort of thing, so I can't describe it here.
My first impression was that it sounded like her, that the recording was very close to what I hear from the live Goddess X. (She told me later that this recording had been done in a studio.) I found myself at times drifting in a pleasant daze and not paying that much attention to her words (which is a sign that the words were going in). I could tell that the wordings on it had been carefully selected so as to not cause a problem no matter what the circumstances were of the listener, but they were delivered with a casual grace that showed no signs of the delicate path she had to follow.
At the end of the recording I had a profound feeling of wanting to obey Goddess X. This was funny because besides a small part of her post trigger deepening there had been no focus on submission or control transfer of any sort. There certainly was not any in the recording.
Time in trance is a funny thing. I was time constrained this time in that I had an appointment following our session. I could have easily believed the recording had used up all of our time but in fact at least half was still left.
She had me stand and follow her to a garden. There she put me to the task of watering various plants which I did in a semi-mechanical manner in response to her directives. At one point she was very specific more or less setting the parameters for an arc of watering much as she might set a sprinkler. Well, once set a sprinkler follows its arc whether or not you are in its path, and I guess so did I. I had no clue that I had sprayed Goddess X until she reacted and then I became aware of it and of its humor, but of course I kept watering as directed.
She directed me back inside. My time sense had been bothering me as the session had seemed to have gone on a long time and I was worried that she had misunderstood my time to be elsewhere as the time I needed to leave her studio. With this bothering me I had the presence of mind to glance at her almost hidden clock and found that she had not misunderstood and there was still time left. (She later commented on my glancing at the clock.) Never trust your time sense in hypnosis.
After a bit more trancing on her table I was on my way. The temptation to stay and chat is strong and she reminded me that I had better get moving. (I made it with just enough time to prep enough to get done what was needed.)
She may be starting a new series of recordings. I look forward to being her test subject or reviewer. Hmm, who knows – if she is thinking of me as she makes these there may soon be a series of "normal" hypnotherapy recordings with just a twist of this twist. We will see.
After a small bit of greeting we entered her studio and she tranced me reclining in that chair of hers. She then asked if I would do something different that day. Well, of course I am always intrigued. The something different was that she had me listen to one of her recorded CDs so I could create a write up about it from a fresh prospective. The CD was related to a non-hypno submission sort of thing, so I can't describe it here.
My first impression was that it sounded like her, that the recording was very close to what I hear from the live Goddess X. (She told me later that this recording had been done in a studio.) I found myself at times drifting in a pleasant daze and not paying that much attention to her words (which is a sign that the words were going in). I could tell that the wordings on it had been carefully selected so as to not cause a problem no matter what the circumstances were of the listener, but they were delivered with a casual grace that showed no signs of the delicate path she had to follow.
At the end of the recording I had a profound feeling of wanting to obey Goddess X. This was funny because besides a small part of her post trigger deepening there had been no focus on submission or control transfer of any sort. There certainly was not any in the recording.
Time in trance is a funny thing. I was time constrained this time in that I had an appointment following our session. I could have easily believed the recording had used up all of our time but in fact at least half was still left.
She had me stand and follow her to a garden. There she put me to the task of watering various plants which I did in a semi-mechanical manner in response to her directives. At one point she was very specific more or less setting the parameters for an arc of watering much as she might set a sprinkler. Well, once set a sprinkler follows its arc whether or not you are in its path, and I guess so did I. I had no clue that I had sprayed Goddess X until she reacted and then I became aware of it and of its humor, but of course I kept watering as directed.
She directed me back inside. My time sense had been bothering me as the session had seemed to have gone on a long time and I was worried that she had misunderstood my time to be elsewhere as the time I needed to leave her studio. With this bothering me I had the presence of mind to glance at her almost hidden clock and found that she had not misunderstood and there was still time left. (She later commented on my glancing at the clock.) Never trust your time sense in hypnosis.
After a bit more trancing on her table I was on my way. The temptation to stay and chat is strong and she reminded me that I had better get moving. (I made it with just enough time to prep enough to get done what was needed.)
She may be starting a new series of recordings. I look forward to being her test subject or reviewer. Hmm, who knows – if she is thinking of me as she makes these there may soon be a series of "normal" hypnotherapy recordings with just a twist of this twist. We will see.
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Become aware that I have another ...
9/12/2005
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This session started very differently. I was going to pick up Goddess X from a car repair place, but she called while I was in transit to say that there was some hang up and her car was not going in as planned and I should meet her at her normal place of business. As I got close to it she called and told me to call her when I had parked and the session would start then.
It has been some time since I've had a telephone session with Goddess X, and even with Goddess N they are now rare. However, when she triggered me instantantly when I called back I relaxed into her words as she took me down with various triggers and with direct suggestions of surrender and submittal. She would often ask me to breath loudly so she could see how I was responding. One key sign of trance is that the rest of the world disappears (selective attention) and this was definitely occurring except as interrupted by environmental factors such as people conversing near my car. She had me open my eyes and hold my palm in front of my eyes and tried to have me envision a heart in it. I'm relatively weak hypnotically regarding suggestions that conflict with observations such as seeing or hearing things that are not there, and this was not the best circumstance, so it is not surprising that the best I got was an impression of a heart. This was good enough so she had me place it next to mine and to transfer positive feelings from it to me.
After about 15 minutes she told me to get out of the car, to cross any necessary streets carefully, and to wait at her front door. This I did – sort of. My only ongoing challenge with Goddess X is staying unobserved, her place of business is close to home for me and it would be easy for a family acquaintance to notice me outside her place of business and casually comment on it later and her place of business is such that I'd have a hard time creating plausible a explanation. I waited near her door but in a less conspicuous place for the 2-3 minutes it took her to arrive.
She had me follow her into her place of business and into her studio ignoring any who tried to greet me. She placed me in that soft reclining chair and had me work the leaver to lean back. With the phone ear bud removed she turned on background music, shut out external lights, and placed a blindfold over me. She said she had a few things she needed to do so I sat there relaxing while she did whatever those were.
When she returned she had me open my eyes and describe how I was feeling. I was pretty blank and tried to say that. She had me sit up and be greeted by her dog, which she often brings to her studio. All this time the dog and been unsuccessfully trying to get my attention. I casually petted her pet as did she, the pet while liking me clearly preferred her attention to mine.
Somebody was at the door! Goddess X directed me to get the door. I was not expecting anybody but had a flash of thought that it might be Goddess B as it is fairly easy for Goddess B to get to Goddess X's place of business. With only a small amount of apprehension, I walked to the door and opened it to find my surprise – Goddess N!
I don't know how much expressions come through when hypnotized, but I felt like I was beaming. I had resigned myself to not seeing her this week. Goddess X directed me to give Mistress N a hug and a kiss, and I almost impulsively gave her a big one before realizing that this was not what she meant. I gave Goddess N a sincere but appropriate hug and kiss and Goddess X directed me to go back into the studio and to lie on the table.
Upon entering the studio, Goddess X asked the logical question – if I had any notes in my pocket this time. Well, this time they caught me by surprise, but they laughed in memory of my first physical encounter with Goddess N when I guessed what was going to happen and prepared a note in advance. (See "Note in my pocket")
They fiddled and fuzzed a bit, and it became clear they were setting up recording equipment including something that had a motor. They did a sound check and decided that they needed to speak loudly to be picked up well. This influenced the tone for the session.
Goddess N started and Goddess X interjected as Goddess N starting following one of her usual inductions while Goddess X used phrases from my fully letting go checklist. Goddess N would pick up on a phrase and elaborate on it and issued some of them herself. The thing is that their trying to be loud interfered with their natural styles. It came across and emphatic and bossy, maybe even with a bit of an attitude. I have no idea how I would have responded to this as a stranger but knowing many of their natural styles it came across as a bit weird for me. That said, it was still effective. After all, here were two excellent hypnotists that I trusted, my Goddesses, ones that can individually trance me into surrender and submission at their whim, and they were both so whimming and using my own words in many cases. Of course it was effective for me!
What was VERY effective was when they talked concurrently rather than in turns. I would hear both of them and respond to both but this did take all of my attention so my soaking up the suggestions was without analysis or filters, there just was not time for such things, or need for them either. Goddess X directed me to have my body disappear and it started to do so, I started becoming unaware of my body.
This did not last long as Goddess X directed me to sit up and then asked me how I was feeling. Sometimes in trance I become very verbal, even semi-manic sometimes, but more of the time I am passive able to respond but not initiating much. The most active verbal activity seems to come after 45 minutes or so of trance but for whatever reason I was still in that blankish fairly passive verbally state and probably did not articulate much.
Goddess X directed me that my phone was ringing. She probably meant a repeat of that answering the shoe thing, but this time I did happen to have a phone handy – this did start as a teletrance after all, so of course I sent for my cell phone. The humor of this was clear to all of us, even to me, and we all were laughing as Goddess X tried to redirect me to the shoe. I did end up answering the shoe after being told to stop my laughing. They asked me who it was and I was pretty blank about it – hallucinations are just not my strong point. The only person I could envision was sitting right there, Goddess N. They asked what I wanted to tell her I told her I was glad she was here and I confessed that I had almost "given her a big one" with the door kiss and they laughed and Goddess X confessed that the had regretted the phrasing just after she said it and said something to the effect that "We will have to be careful with that kissing stuff next time."
Blogging has become a habit to me, and one thing I pick up on are possible blog subject lines. I love to tease the readers and the mistresses by using subject lines that I hold are intriguing and accurate even if not quite as expected. This session was full of these, and "We will have to be careful with that kissing stuff next time" is one of them.
Goddess N directed me deeper and Goddess X directed me to get the door, that somebody was there. I walked to the door, opened it, did not find anybody, and returned. The Mistresses had rearranged themselves so that Goddess N was in the recliner and Goddess X directed me to kneel at Goddess Ns feet and to take her bare feet. What an opportunity! Not for me, but for the dog who promptly inserted herself into the interaction by giving both of Goddess N's feet a through and very wet licking. Ok, "Licking her feet" was added as a possible blog subject line for the session. At several times in the session they had to tell me to stop laughing. I would but they sometimes gave me new reasons to begin.
Goddess X brought me some hand cream, much firmer stuff than Goddess N normally uses, so she had me warm it up in my hand and with my breath. I almost offered it to the dog for additional warming. In my hypno-klutzy way I applied some of it to her pants before settling down. Goddess N directed me to go deeper and to feel the muscles of her foot. Goddess X, who has a reputation as being an expert in appreciating foot massages, directed me to apply my knuckles to the middle of her foot, which I did. Goddess X thought firmness was appropriate so she directed me to push as if I were trying to reach the top of the foot. I did not see Goddess N's reaction, but I heard Goddess X's reaction to Goddess N's reaction – I guess I did press rather firmly in response to that directive and Goddess N must have reacted.
So I continued with the foot and lower calf making occasional eye contact with Goddess N. I knew Goddess X was around, but as far as physical presence it was limited to Goddess N and only to parts of her. Goddess N is used to this and gave a suggestion such as "Now you start to become aware that I have another foot", which Goddess X found hysterical and verbally speculated about the appropriateness of her using a variant of that phrase in her personal life.
Goddess X noticed I had not switched feet nbut Goddess N knew that I was aware of the other foot but had not been told to do anything with this awareness. I was directed to start with the other foot and this I did until I was directed to get more cream. Again I warmed and again I considered having the dog help in the manner she seemed to want. As I was on the other foot Goddess N reminded me that I wanted to please her, needed to please her, and that this applied to both of the present Mistresses. Again I was lost in the foot.
Goddess X had tried a few times to see if Goddess N wanted to trance out during the foot attention. It seemed appealing to Goddess N but she did not. I commented after awakening that there is some unpredictability with the three of us present as we all have histories of trancing each other. However, we do not trance without willingness so unexpected surrender only occasionally occurs.
I was directed to a sink where I warmed a hand towel with hot water and wrung it out before applying it to Goddess N's feet in a manner that I intended to be both a cleaning and a massage.
They placed me back on the table and, reminding me once again that I did not even have a note in my pocket, quickly woke me up.
Goddess X invited me to share a lunch with the two of them. We had some good chats covering various topics, some sharable and some which generated possible blog title lines that could be completely misinterpreted. "There is more to it that even you know about" would be the most innocent of these, some of the others I had to promise to not use. There is a real sense of comfort among us. We are not involved in each other's lives, but we are aware of much of each other's lives and much of the discussion was sharing and expanding this awareness. Goddess X did pick up on another form of expression of my patterns of not accepting assistance from others asked once or twice something to the effect of "do I have to order you to …". There is an intimacy in hypnosis, a bonding, and perhaps part of its attraction for me is that it gives a means to penetrate past a shield I otherwise wield so very diligently.
I'm so lucky to have these Goddesses. It still amazes me and it often still feels like a dream. That "Deep Trancer" guy and all that stuff he gets to do, that couldn't be me, could it? It feels like a dream right now. Maybe I'll never need to wake up.
It has been some time since I've had a telephone session with Goddess X, and even with Goddess N they are now rare. However, when she triggered me instantantly when I called back I relaxed into her words as she took me down with various triggers and with direct suggestions of surrender and submittal. She would often ask me to breath loudly so she could see how I was responding. One key sign of trance is that the rest of the world disappears (selective attention) and this was definitely occurring except as interrupted by environmental factors such as people conversing near my car. She had me open my eyes and hold my palm in front of my eyes and tried to have me envision a heart in it. I'm relatively weak hypnotically regarding suggestions that conflict with observations such as seeing or hearing things that are not there, and this was not the best circumstance, so it is not surprising that the best I got was an impression of a heart. This was good enough so she had me place it next to mine and to transfer positive feelings from it to me.
After about 15 minutes she told me to get out of the car, to cross any necessary streets carefully, and to wait at her front door. This I did – sort of. My only ongoing challenge with Goddess X is staying unobserved, her place of business is close to home for me and it would be easy for a family acquaintance to notice me outside her place of business and casually comment on it later and her place of business is such that I'd have a hard time creating plausible a explanation. I waited near her door but in a less conspicuous place for the 2-3 minutes it took her to arrive.
She had me follow her into her place of business and into her studio ignoring any who tried to greet me. She placed me in that soft reclining chair and had me work the leaver to lean back. With the phone ear bud removed she turned on background music, shut out external lights, and placed a blindfold over me. She said she had a few things she needed to do so I sat there relaxing while she did whatever those were.
When she returned she had me open my eyes and describe how I was feeling. I was pretty blank and tried to say that. She had me sit up and be greeted by her dog, which she often brings to her studio. All this time the dog and been unsuccessfully trying to get my attention. I casually petted her pet as did she, the pet while liking me clearly preferred her attention to mine.
Somebody was at the door! Goddess X directed me to get the door. I was not expecting anybody but had a flash of thought that it might be Goddess B as it is fairly easy for Goddess B to get to Goddess X's place of business. With only a small amount of apprehension, I walked to the door and opened it to find my surprise – Goddess N!
I don't know how much expressions come through when hypnotized, but I felt like I was beaming. I had resigned myself to not seeing her this week. Goddess X directed me to give Mistress N a hug and a kiss, and I almost impulsively gave her a big one before realizing that this was not what she meant. I gave Goddess N a sincere but appropriate hug and kiss and Goddess X directed me to go back into the studio and to lie on the table.
Upon entering the studio, Goddess X asked the logical question – if I had any notes in my pocket this time. Well, this time they caught me by surprise, but they laughed in memory of my first physical encounter with Goddess N when I guessed what was going to happen and prepared a note in advance. (See "Note in my pocket")
They fiddled and fuzzed a bit, and it became clear they were setting up recording equipment including something that had a motor. They did a sound check and decided that they needed to speak loudly to be picked up well. This influenced the tone for the session.
Goddess N started and Goddess X interjected as Goddess N starting following one of her usual inductions while Goddess X used phrases from my fully letting go checklist. Goddess N would pick up on a phrase and elaborate on it and issued some of them herself. The thing is that their trying to be loud interfered with their natural styles. It came across and emphatic and bossy, maybe even with a bit of an attitude. I have no idea how I would have responded to this as a stranger but knowing many of their natural styles it came across as a bit weird for me. That said, it was still effective. After all, here were two excellent hypnotists that I trusted, my Goddesses, ones that can individually trance me into surrender and submission at their whim, and they were both so whimming and using my own words in many cases. Of course it was effective for me!
What was VERY effective was when they talked concurrently rather than in turns. I would hear both of them and respond to both but this did take all of my attention so my soaking up the suggestions was without analysis or filters, there just was not time for such things, or need for them either. Goddess X directed me to have my body disappear and it started to do so, I started becoming unaware of my body.
This did not last long as Goddess X directed me to sit up and then asked me how I was feeling. Sometimes in trance I become very verbal, even semi-manic sometimes, but more of the time I am passive able to respond but not initiating much. The most active verbal activity seems to come after 45 minutes or so of trance but for whatever reason I was still in that blankish fairly passive verbally state and probably did not articulate much.
Goddess X directed me that my phone was ringing. She probably meant a repeat of that answering the shoe thing, but this time I did happen to have a phone handy – this did start as a teletrance after all, so of course I sent for my cell phone. The humor of this was clear to all of us, even to me, and we all were laughing as Goddess X tried to redirect me to the shoe. I did end up answering the shoe after being told to stop my laughing. They asked me who it was and I was pretty blank about it – hallucinations are just not my strong point. The only person I could envision was sitting right there, Goddess N. They asked what I wanted to tell her I told her I was glad she was here and I confessed that I had almost "given her a big one" with the door kiss and they laughed and Goddess X confessed that the had regretted the phrasing just after she said it and said something to the effect that "We will have to be careful with that kissing stuff next time."
Blogging has become a habit to me, and one thing I pick up on are possible blog subject lines. I love to tease the readers and the mistresses by using subject lines that I hold are intriguing and accurate even if not quite as expected. This session was full of these, and "We will have to be careful with that kissing stuff next time" is one of them.
Goddess N directed me deeper and Goddess X directed me to get the door, that somebody was there. I walked to the door, opened it, did not find anybody, and returned. The Mistresses had rearranged themselves so that Goddess N was in the recliner and Goddess X directed me to kneel at Goddess Ns feet and to take her bare feet. What an opportunity! Not for me, but for the dog who promptly inserted herself into the interaction by giving both of Goddess N's feet a through and very wet licking. Ok, "Licking her feet" was added as a possible blog subject line for the session. At several times in the session they had to tell me to stop laughing. I would but they sometimes gave me new reasons to begin.
Goddess X brought me some hand cream, much firmer stuff than Goddess N normally uses, so she had me warm it up in my hand and with my breath. I almost offered it to the dog for additional warming. In my hypno-klutzy way I applied some of it to her pants before settling down. Goddess N directed me to go deeper and to feel the muscles of her foot. Goddess X, who has a reputation as being an expert in appreciating foot massages, directed me to apply my knuckles to the middle of her foot, which I did. Goddess X thought firmness was appropriate so she directed me to push as if I were trying to reach the top of the foot. I did not see Goddess N's reaction, but I heard Goddess X's reaction to Goddess N's reaction – I guess I did press rather firmly in response to that directive and Goddess N must have reacted.
So I continued with the foot and lower calf making occasional eye contact with Goddess N. I knew Goddess X was around, but as far as physical presence it was limited to Goddess N and only to parts of her. Goddess N is used to this and gave a suggestion such as "Now you start to become aware that I have another foot", which Goddess X found hysterical and verbally speculated about the appropriateness of her using a variant of that phrase in her personal life.
Goddess X noticed I had not switched feet nbut Goddess N knew that I was aware of the other foot but had not been told to do anything with this awareness. I was directed to start with the other foot and this I did until I was directed to get more cream. Again I warmed and again I considered having the dog help in the manner she seemed to want. As I was on the other foot Goddess N reminded me that I wanted to please her, needed to please her, and that this applied to both of the present Mistresses. Again I was lost in the foot.
Goddess X had tried a few times to see if Goddess N wanted to trance out during the foot attention. It seemed appealing to Goddess N but she did not. I commented after awakening that there is some unpredictability with the three of us present as we all have histories of trancing each other. However, we do not trance without willingness so unexpected surrender only occasionally occurs.
I was directed to a sink where I warmed a hand towel with hot water and wrung it out before applying it to Goddess N's feet in a manner that I intended to be both a cleaning and a massage.
They placed me back on the table and, reminding me once again that I did not even have a note in my pocket, quickly woke me up.
Goddess X invited me to share a lunch with the two of them. We had some good chats covering various topics, some sharable and some which generated possible blog title lines that could be completely misinterpreted. "There is more to it that even you know about" would be the most innocent of these, some of the others I had to promise to not use. There is a real sense of comfort among us. We are not involved in each other's lives, but we are aware of much of each other's lives and much of the discussion was sharing and expanding this awareness. Goddess X did pick up on another form of expression of my patterns of not accepting assistance from others asked once or twice something to the effect of "do I have to order you to …". There is an intimacy in hypnosis, a bonding, and perhaps part of its attraction for me is that it gives a means to penetrate past a shield I otherwise wield so very diligently.
I'm so lucky to have these Goddesses. It still amazes me and it often still feels like a dream. That "Deep Trancer" guy and all that stuff he gets to do, that couldn't be me, could it? It feels like a dream right now. Maybe I'll never need to wake up.
Goddess N's Disappointment
9/10/2005
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Due to unexpected complications, Goddess N had to cancel her session with me this week.
She made up for it. Details later.
She made up for it. Details later.
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Silent Echos
9/08/2005
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I arrived a bit before Goddess N but others had left the doors open. We had some business to explore so I wondered into the room where we would normally do this in order to get things set up. Well, when she arrived we found that a crucial piece of equipment was not working that day so we headed into her studio.
After not much more chit-chat and after a brief comment from her on how it was sometimes hard to transition after normal style interactions, she waved her hand and snapped her fingers and my trancing started. It soon became clear to me that she too was going to do a completely non-verbal session, and this was just one day after Goddess X had done it. I was pretty sure and Goddess N later confirmed that she had not been in communication with Goddess X and had no idea this had just been done. I probably smiled a bit while descending into my trance and I imagine that such reactions must always worry Goddess N at least a bit. Those smiles are often reaction to some so-far secret knowledge and she must be wondering if I will be pulling out a note or if I just composed something like the red rose, yellow rose thing.
Well, if my hypnotic memories were already blurry from the non-verbal session with Goddess X, imagine what effect experiencing another deep one the next day must have on blurring the memory timeline. Non verbal trances are about emotions, being in sync with each other, and flowing with the moment. Without the complexity of language you are stripped to these all too often shielded essentials. If they can stay in sync with you, or clue you such that you stay in sync with them, then it works and is magical. I suspect that if the sync were lost it would quickly become awkward. Interestingly, both Goddesses reported that they expected that this experience with me would make them better hypnotists, and that they were inclined to fold more non-verbal clues into their regular sessions.
So with the blurring effect, I cannot report with any accuracy on what she did to deepen the trance. It involved things from her usual bag of tricks such as pressure on the shoulders, moving the head, making limbs be rigid or limp, or guiding my eyes. It is in part because these are part of her usual hypnotic vocabulary that they do not form a sequence. I cannot even be sure that they happened this session or if I'm just "filling in" with impressions from earlier sessions. However it was done, it was as effective as her normal verbally assisted trance, or even more so, and I was soon lost in the world that consisted of just her (or sometimes just parts of her) and whatever she was directing.
At one point she pulled out that bottle of hand lotion and I started applying it as before, mostly to the back of her hands but also to the front and massaging whatever caught my attention.
She pulled out her tea cup and bag and, following the script from prior sessions, I fetched hot water and started raising and lowering the tea bag. However, when I thought it was about done she had other ideas and gently directed me out of her office and into the front seat of her car. She closed my eyes and I proceeded to ride unquestiongly to wherever she had in mind with only occasional reminder touches from her. The distance and turns seemed to be consistent with that earlier car ride to a Starbucks, but this is so hard to measure she could have taken me any number of places.
She got out of the car and left me there. I did not fret or worry at all; I trusted she would return in an appropriate time. When she did return she confirmed that I was still tranced and fed me a bite of either a bagel or one of those pretzel things you get at smoothie places. I was chewing it and enjoying the taste when she signaled me to become more passive and deep. I guess she remembered about the swallowing difficulty in trance thing because she reversed herself long enough for me to get the food down.
Back in her office it was some more time in the chair and then I found myself massaging a feet and applying that lotion. I continued the massage dream through all the muscles I could identify working upward until she signaled me to stop. She did not have me do the other foot right away and had me do something else I cannot sequence right now, but eventually I was back at the other foot.
I noticed that she was showing signs of trancing out. That is a very easy and natural thing to do in the setting, the atmosphere in the room is so "trancy" that it feels like if a stranger entered they would collapse obliviously tranced within a few seconds. In Goddess N's case it is a particular quandary. She loves having me submitted, in her complete control, yet part of her seems to yearn to go as well while another part fears it. I appreciate her quandary but probably have a strangely indifferent attitude toward it. I can sum it up as "Red Roses, Yellow Roses, I like them both just the same, and perhaps in time so will you." As I like both roses, it does not matter to me which she most likes at any particular moment because I'll simply adopt the appropriate complimentary and supportive role. I can also handle a mixed bouquet.
(Ok, now I have her both laughing and shaking her head.)
We have some wonderous and mutually fulfilling interactions. It saddens me that more have not discovered this.
After not much more chit-chat and after a brief comment from her on how it was sometimes hard to transition after normal style interactions, she waved her hand and snapped her fingers and my trancing started. It soon became clear to me that she too was going to do a completely non-verbal session, and this was just one day after Goddess X had done it. I was pretty sure and Goddess N later confirmed that she had not been in communication with Goddess X and had no idea this had just been done. I probably smiled a bit while descending into my trance and I imagine that such reactions must always worry Goddess N at least a bit. Those smiles are often reaction to some so-far secret knowledge and she must be wondering if I will be pulling out a note or if I just composed something like the red rose, yellow rose thing.
Well, if my hypnotic memories were already blurry from the non-verbal session with Goddess X, imagine what effect experiencing another deep one the next day must have on blurring the memory timeline. Non verbal trances are about emotions, being in sync with each other, and flowing with the moment. Without the complexity of language you are stripped to these all too often shielded essentials. If they can stay in sync with you, or clue you such that you stay in sync with them, then it works and is magical. I suspect that if the sync were lost it would quickly become awkward. Interestingly, both Goddesses reported that they expected that this experience with me would make them better hypnotists, and that they were inclined to fold more non-verbal clues into their regular sessions.
So with the blurring effect, I cannot report with any accuracy on what she did to deepen the trance. It involved things from her usual bag of tricks such as pressure on the shoulders, moving the head, making limbs be rigid or limp, or guiding my eyes. It is in part because these are part of her usual hypnotic vocabulary that they do not form a sequence. I cannot even be sure that they happened this session or if I'm just "filling in" with impressions from earlier sessions. However it was done, it was as effective as her normal verbally assisted trance, or even more so, and I was soon lost in the world that consisted of just her (or sometimes just parts of her) and whatever she was directing.
At one point she pulled out that bottle of hand lotion and I started applying it as before, mostly to the back of her hands but also to the front and massaging whatever caught my attention.
She pulled out her tea cup and bag and, following the script from prior sessions, I fetched hot water and started raising and lowering the tea bag. However, when I thought it was about done she had other ideas and gently directed me out of her office and into the front seat of her car. She closed my eyes and I proceeded to ride unquestiongly to wherever she had in mind with only occasional reminder touches from her. The distance and turns seemed to be consistent with that earlier car ride to a Starbucks, but this is so hard to measure she could have taken me any number of places.
She got out of the car and left me there. I did not fret or worry at all; I trusted she would return in an appropriate time. When she did return she confirmed that I was still tranced and fed me a bite of either a bagel or one of those pretzel things you get at smoothie places. I was chewing it and enjoying the taste when she signaled me to become more passive and deep. I guess she remembered about the swallowing difficulty in trance thing because she reversed herself long enough for me to get the food down.
Back in her office it was some more time in the chair and then I found myself massaging a feet and applying that lotion. I continued the massage dream through all the muscles I could identify working upward until she signaled me to stop. She did not have me do the other foot right away and had me do something else I cannot sequence right now, but eventually I was back at the other foot.
I noticed that she was showing signs of trancing out. That is a very easy and natural thing to do in the setting, the atmosphere in the room is so "trancy" that it feels like if a stranger entered they would collapse obliviously tranced within a few seconds. In Goddess N's case it is a particular quandary. She loves having me submitted, in her complete control, yet part of her seems to yearn to go as well while another part fears it. I appreciate her quandary but probably have a strangely indifferent attitude toward it. I can sum it up as "Red Roses, Yellow Roses, I like them both just the same, and perhaps in time so will you." As I like both roses, it does not matter to me which she most likes at any particular moment because I'll simply adopt the appropriate complimentary and supportive role. I can also handle a mixed bouquet.
(Ok, now I have her both laughing and shaking her head.)
We have some wonderous and mutually fulfilling interactions. It saddens me that more have not discovered this.
2 Comments:
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said...
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So Deep Trancer...where you already in trance that you do not remember the beginning handshake part of entering trance.
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Deep Trancer said...
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I remember now; it all blurs.
Silent Cheater
9/07/2005
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Goddess X greeted me with no communication other than a smile and a wave to enter her lair. She uses a lot of non-verbal communication anyway and has given me the Silent Treatment and this silence was as conspicuous as it was then. She pointed to a chair by a computer at a desk in her waiting area and had me sit there. She then directed my attention to a screen with was in screen saver mode and hit a key to cause the screen saver to clear and reveal in huge letters the R trigger phrase.
A trigger is a trigger, I guess, except for when it is messed up in a way so as to be humorous, so I found my eyes closed and myself sinking down into trance. She tapped me and had me look at the screen where she had another trigger phrase. She repeated this cycle a few times with more triggers and deepening phrases and then tapped me and had me stand up and follow her into her studio.
By silent gestures only she had me plug in a water sculpture and pull out a pendulum. She then had me recline back in that soft chair of hers and she started some music. It turned out to be more than just music as it was a Yoga hypnosis thing (given a fancy and nearly unpronounceable name to disguise that it was hypnosis, but it was clearly a progressive relaxation induction). The music was good, but the male speaker was only so-so having both unclear articulation and a poor sense of timing. (Goddess X later related that she had not played that part of the CD before and thought she would have me there when she sampled it.)
Goddess X let it play through but stopped it at a logical point. One thing about silent sessions is that they make the usual blurriness of hypnosis much blurrier. Without speaking, there are no clear transitions and nothing on which to anchor a memory, so the memory is even more an unordered sequence of impressions than it normally is.
(Blog readers: I have probably underemphasized this effect by giving sequential accounts of most sessions. What is not visible is how hard it sometimes is to order my memories into a sensible timeline.)
In the general blur are impressions of looking at the pendulum; holding it; having her tap me to have her look at her hand as she raised it and then lowered it reclosing my eyes in the process (basically fractionalization); and other repeats of things that are common elements of a session. She tried at one point to get me to talk, but I was pleasantly blank and had nothing to say. She tried harder and all I could say was that I was blank and had nothing to say and she let it be left with that.
The waking up was interesting. I was confused as to if she wanted me to stand or to wake up but soon figured that out. However, once awake and thinking again I can express my playful side and I do enjoy teasing the Mistresses when I get the chance. All I did was to stay silent. I looked at her attentively and would try to figure out her intent, but I was going to wait for her to speak first. I think this surprised and somewhat flustered her, enough so that she resorted to writing a note to me asking how I felt. The problem with using handwritten communication with me is immediately obvious to anybody who ever sees my handwriting. We had a small conversation punctuated with many requests from her for me to redo a word or to try to write more legibly. She wrote that she was probably cheating by writing and I agreed as it was language based communication even if it were not carried by sound. She wrote that she missed our communications and I agreed on this as well – she and I have both been busier than earlier in our blogged history and our level of communication is way down. She is my supreme Mistress, but the seduction of the intensity I can direct into my work has a long established place in me.
Finally the big hand was on the 12 and this was the time limit she had set before she would allow herself to talk. With obvious relief she switched to verbal communication. We chatted for another 30 minutes or so and covered among other things my lifestyle pattern of not expressing my needs. It is deeply ingrained in me that I take care of my own needs. I take care of the needs of others as well but I do not normally let myself get into a position where my needs are dependent upon others. I get along well, can sometimes read individuals well, can generally read groups extraordinarily well, work well in teams, am often a change agent and a leader, but am basically generally a loner who does not maintain many relationships and this may be from this fierce independence. I mention this mainly because it may relate to my submissive side where my submissive side is the extreme opposite of this normal state of mine.
A trigger is a trigger, I guess, except for when it is messed up in a way so as to be humorous, so I found my eyes closed and myself sinking down into trance. She tapped me and had me look at the screen where she had another trigger phrase. She repeated this cycle a few times with more triggers and deepening phrases and then tapped me and had me stand up and follow her into her studio.
By silent gestures only she had me plug in a water sculpture and pull out a pendulum. She then had me recline back in that soft chair of hers and she started some music. It turned out to be more than just music as it was a Yoga hypnosis thing (given a fancy and nearly unpronounceable name to disguise that it was hypnosis, but it was clearly a progressive relaxation induction). The music was good, but the male speaker was only so-so having both unclear articulation and a poor sense of timing. (Goddess X later related that she had not played that part of the CD before and thought she would have me there when she sampled it.)
Goddess X let it play through but stopped it at a logical point. One thing about silent sessions is that they make the usual blurriness of hypnosis much blurrier. Without speaking, there are no clear transitions and nothing on which to anchor a memory, so the memory is even more an unordered sequence of impressions than it normally is.
(Blog readers: I have probably underemphasized this effect by giving sequential accounts of most sessions. What is not visible is how hard it sometimes is to order my memories into a sensible timeline.)
In the general blur are impressions of looking at the pendulum; holding it; having her tap me to have her look at her hand as she raised it and then lowered it reclosing my eyes in the process (basically fractionalization); and other repeats of things that are common elements of a session. She tried at one point to get me to talk, but I was pleasantly blank and had nothing to say. She tried harder and all I could say was that I was blank and had nothing to say and she let it be left with that.
The waking up was interesting. I was confused as to if she wanted me to stand or to wake up but soon figured that out. However, once awake and thinking again I can express my playful side and I do enjoy teasing the Mistresses when I get the chance. All I did was to stay silent. I looked at her attentively and would try to figure out her intent, but I was going to wait for her to speak first. I think this surprised and somewhat flustered her, enough so that she resorted to writing a note to me asking how I felt. The problem with using handwritten communication with me is immediately obvious to anybody who ever sees my handwriting. We had a small conversation punctuated with many requests from her for me to redo a word or to try to write more legibly. She wrote that she was probably cheating by writing and I agreed as it was language based communication even if it were not carried by sound. She wrote that she missed our communications and I agreed on this as well – she and I have both been busier than earlier in our blogged history and our level of communication is way down. She is my supreme Mistress, but the seduction of the intensity I can direct into my work has a long established place in me.
Finally the big hand was on the 12 and this was the time limit she had set before she would allow herself to talk. With obvious relief she switched to verbal communication. We chatted for another 30 minutes or so and covered among other things my lifestyle pattern of not expressing my needs. It is deeply ingrained in me that I take care of my own needs. I take care of the needs of others as well but I do not normally let myself get into a position where my needs are dependent upon others. I get along well, can sometimes read individuals well, can generally read groups extraordinarily well, work well in teams, am often a change agent and a leader, but am basically generally a loner who does not maintain many relationships and this may be from this fierce independence. I mention this mainly because it may relate to my submissive side where my submissive side is the extreme opposite of this normal state of mine.
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Silent Agreement
9/01/2005
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Today it seems that Goddess X and Goddess N came to a silent agreement, or perhaps I should say an agreement about silence.
This is one technique that will not work over the phone. Details later.
This is one technique that will not work over the phone. Details later.
3 Comments:
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Deep Trancer said...
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So I guess now I'm the silent one. I'll blogone tonight.
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said...
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Still waiting....dear submissive one. ......
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Deep Trancer said...
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Hmm, there seems to be some pent up blog demand. For the record, Goddess B is also asking where are the usual posts about her sessions.
0 Comments: