Beyond N's Eyes

Had an in-person with Goddess N in her second studio location.

I waited in the reception area for just a minute or two before she greeted me. We talked about Goddess X a bit when with no warning she just did a quick wave across my face, snapped her fingers, and told me to "sleep". My head dropped instantly. (I had buzzed just talking to her.) In her soft voice she gave me words to go even deeper still while occasionally pressing on a shoulder or head. She certainly was delivering suggestions to submit, and she may have been also delivering suggestions to desire and to need to please her. At one point I stood up and gently swayed under her encouragement.

She asked me what I wanted from the session. In hindsight I can say that the answer should have been "Everything and Nothing". I had not arrived with any particular desired event and I think I managed to articulate that.

The timeline is just guesswork from this point.

She squatted or sat in front of me (I was in a chair) and had me look into her eyes while giving me suggestions to go deeper, to submit, etc. I found it very easy to look at her eyes indefinitely, and I'd sometimes be looking at one or the other, or at both, or at all 4 of them. (She does not wear glasses; the 4-eye effect was from my eye coordination.) I was lost in those eyes while her voice bounced around in my mind. I remember the voice, but not the words. I was just feeling mindless comfort and contentment and to the very minimal degree I could have any wish at all, it was just for "More, More!" I definitely wanted/needed/was compelled to please her, and I was ready to do whatever she wanted. I was definitely submitted to her and those gorgeous hypnotic eyes.

Somewhere in here she started referring to herself as Goddess, but it might have been "Goddess for you" or "your Goddess". (I don't think she is ready to be a Goddess in general, but she is ok with or even desirous of being a Goddess to me.) It didn't matter, she was my Goddess, I was in her spell, I was submitting to her, and was going to do whatever she wanted. She was my Goddess.

We did the eyes again later. In both times I think she planted the idea that I'd be able to see her eyes over the phone. It is funny how something that started with a perfect unknown mysterious female hypnotist and a perfect mysterious male subject is migrating to be anchored by something as intimate (but still mysterious) as eyes.

She practiced with unspoken suggestions, where by touch alone she made one arm stiff and then the other, made them fall, crossed and bent them, and had my hands moving in circles first in one direction and then in the other. She also used them during eye contact to get me to close my eyes again.

Hmm, there she is again squatting in front of me, and is that an emery board? I'm not sure who filed my nails. I think I did some of it, but she may have done some also. Even my fingers were submitted to her. She used the sound and sight of the board to take me even deeper. I then did her nails, being somewhat concerned about my level of coordination and that I would do them correctly. She didn't help at all by continuing to give me those compelling suggestions. You just want to fade away, but you are faded away and you get that much more intensely into what you are doing. My universe was very narrow right then, just the warm and soft feel of her fingers, the sound of the emery board, and the sound of her voice.

She had me look at her hand, which was held close to my face. She then gave me suggestions about it moving, disappearing, and reappearing. I sort of had a dual consciousness, one working from the suggested imagery, and one working from where her hand actually was. Note that this sort of imagery involvement is where my hypnotic skills are weakest.

Back eyes closed in the chair and she is moving next to me. I'm confirming that I will do anything she asks (and I meant it) and that I desire/want/need to please her. I did so want that but hypnotic inertia and mindlessness prevented me from making any attempt to guess what that might be, so I just waited for instructions.

She had me standing up being a tree for a short while. We ended up switching chairs, I'm not sure why. I think she did something with me from the changed position, but it is lost to me.

She started talking about wanting tea and how I would go out to the reception area (shared with other practitioners) and get her some. She described the location of the water and tea bag and wanted assurance that I would stay in trace. Well, this was a non-issue because just as I am weak at imagery, I'm great at physical interaction. Moving around causes some greater alertness as I'm making decisions and navigating, but I still stay profoundly under. Soon I was in trace opening her studio door and walking unescorted into the reception area to fetch the tea. I heard some voices talking but didn't pay any attention. (In hindsight, they were talking over some business.) When walking back to her studio I noticed one person, a 30ish good looking lady waiting for somebody, and I had a brief thought of wondering what she would think if she knew that I was fully in Mistress N's control.

After a short while back in the chair, Mistress N announced that she was hungry and started moving around. She said something like "I bet you are wondering what happens next". (Post session comment: Watch out, Mistress N, the last time somebody said something like that I gave you a surprising note.) Well, this time I not only did not have any notes, I also had not been thinking at all about what might happen next. That she said she was hungry and was moving around was not sufficient to start me wondering, I was merely waiting to be told what happens next, and content to do so. I knew that she would tell me what to do, and I would do it. There is no need for wondering.

She escorted me to the kitchen and gave me directions in small increments that resulted in her sandwich being microwaved in 2 phases and assembled. I had enough mental horsepower to do small things correctly, such as picking up the sandwich by the plate on which it was sitting. I was mindless between tasks, instead of finishing and thinking "What next", I just finished and waited. After the assembly was complete she escorted me back. I have no idea if anybody saw us and I would not have cared if they had. It may be for the best that we did not run across people because up close it may have been obvious I was in a funny state (or they might have just thought I was a bit weird), and if somebody had asked I probably would have given a full confession.

Back in her room, I returned to the chair. She offered to share her food but I declined. I don't think she ate.

(General note to Mistress N, and to the other Mistresses: I tend to book lunch sessions and I am very appreciative that you accommodate me so often. I also know that you may have sessions close together or other demands. So I have a special request: If you are hungry, please eat. I'm well fed, probably too well fed, and I do not have blood sugar issues or "food crashes" so please presume that I have or will take care of myself food wise. Don't think of it as being impolite or distracting, it is not and I'm generally too far gone to care. Actually, it would be a statement of our trust and bonds if you were comfortable eating in session with me.)

I received suggestions about being hypnotized at the first sound of her voice or with her touches. No problem!

We had another very nice eye contact interaction. Lots of deep gazing, "look beyond my eyes", suggestions delivered and forgotten, and lots of silent communication. I love to be there and to be submitted to her, and I think she loves to have me there. I think she may have suggested a bond, but if so it was just stating the reality. There is a deep bond between us, and it seems to be getting deeper with each submittal. I was completely comfortable beyond her eyes, in her control, comforted, wanting to please her. It was and is comforting to know that she can put me back there so easily and that she is inclined to do so again. When she mentioned the bond, it was if there was a very strong 1/2 inch bar or pipe connecting our heads. As I'm writing this, I'm wishing she was here or I was there again. Looking into those eyes, trusting, surrendered and submitted, and feeling that intimate bond is so perfect on so many levels that it is beyond my current power to describe.

After a bit more chair time, she had me notice the sound of the clock ticking. I had a flash of that previously unnoticed clock being my enemy, something working against my goals, something to be resisted. Oh no! She is waking me up. A slow count to 5 with some more suggestions delivered through it and I've climbed back out of that well into wakefulness.

Chatted shortly regarding some business things, but she had another client due.

This was a great session, and one that is fading rapidly from my memory. (This effect of hypnosis is so weird.) The last session had a long residual effect, and I can tell that this one will as well. I'm just sitting here soaking in that warm bonded feeling. When you next call, my Goddess, or when I next see you, I will go, happily go, and probably go even farther.

Thank You, this was perfect.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not many people get to visit heaven on their lunch hour. Thank for sharing the pleasure.

5/18/2005 4:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It was perfect wasn't it!

5/19/2005 10:47 PM  
Comments:
Not many people get to visit heaven on their lunch hour. Thank for sharing the pleasure.
 
It was perfect wasn't it!
 
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