Stepping out of Goddess B's box
5/15/2005
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Goddess B and I had our first session since I participated in hypnotizing her regarding some core rejections in her life and after I told her that today she was a Goddess.
She greeted me outside her door (in a place not visible to anyone else). I had just enough time to verbally remind her that today she was a Goddess when she tranced me with the "R" trigger.
With little deepening, she had me start right in on some housework related to a pending trip of hers including sweeping dust off of a suitcase, pouring cat food, stacking a hose, and refilling a bird feeder. She gave hypnotic phrases and deepenings as I was doing this, even getting into the tones of voice and timings she normally uses in her session room. I probably would have preferred some deepenings before starting in, but I am conditioned to that trance trigger, and to the degree I wasn't I was aware that she needed this and so I let myself go.
She awoke me and seemed a bit shy. Without her asking, I directly assured her that I was fine with what she was doing. That seemed to be all she needed and she retriggered me.
It is funny. I do not really enjoy the housework although it was better with the stream of her hypnotic patter than an earlier time when Goddess X zombified me for an hour with less than a minute of induction. I'd probably enjoy it more if I were deeper to start with because the inductions and deepenings do help me get rid of the world from which I came. What is funny is that whether it is what I would have most enjoyed or not was not relevant to whether I was doing it. Both Goddess B and Goddess X have demonstrated that with very minimal triggering that they can have me doing household chores. Whether I had a choice about doing them or not is a theoretical question because thoughts of not doing them never crossed my mind. It might not have been my favorite thing, but she told me to do it, and I did it without question. As I look back on it, I see that there is some profound declaration or indication of surrender in this.
I washed my hands in there somewhere, I'm not sure if it was while under or not.
After retriggering, she took me into her kitchen where I did something trivial with a water jug. The next stop was her living room where she asked me if I played any instruments (regretfully, no). She then had me discuss the weather (why does she always chose this?) and then wind up and look at a music box she had in there.
I found that while I had encouraged her to not be worried about the massage parts of the session that I was missing them. There is something deeply soothing in entering "that" room, undressing and getting on the table, and zoning out to her voice and touches.
She awakened me. I again assured her without being asked that all was fine from my point of view as I knew she would be concerned about this. She retranced me and took me to her studio. She had me sit on the unmade massage table (no sheets) and used a pendulum on me. I have a strong image of watching it as she stood before me and of repeating her phrases, but the pendulum magic seems to have again worked – despite having repeated the phrases several times, I do not remember what they were! They were probably related to going deeper, to her being a Goddess, to my doing anything she asks, and maybe about emailing, but I'm not sure if I might not be just filling in the blank with miscellaneous associations.
She then had me make the table. Handling fitted sheets is normally no big deal, but it was a bit of a challenge while hypnotized. She then had me undress and get under the sheets and then call her.
The session then started to fall into our common pattern. She probably was rushing a bit because her total time was less due to the other activities, but the rushing was not obvious. She also threw in more hypnotic commanding activities including activating a Minnie Mouse doll. I don’t know what she had planned as the doll's batteries were dead.
She awoke me in mid massage to discuss the prior day's session where I had helped with her cathartic hypnotized release. She said that I was very effective as a hypnotist. We talked of two key moments as I saw them, one when she gave that paragraph of pained questions to her husband, the one that said so much both in words and between the lines. The other was when she was on the verge of accepting her worth and need a bit of pushing to let the thought settle inside of her.
After retriggering and some more massage, she had me light a candle can (a candle with 3 wicks) and kneel in front of it for a bit while she said some things about which I now have no memories. She also couldn't help herself and just had to give me what she perceived as beneficial suggestions, this time relating to exercise. (She had not read my blogged comments re this.) She delivered a rational that helping me was helping her. I know how hard it is for her to simply accept attention or help and to do things for herself rather than for others, so I guess some of this was needed for her comfort.
After she had awakened me we had a bit of discussion, mostly about this next week when I will not be seeing her due to schedule limitations. Goddess B did comment that she did not make notes for this session, that she had wanted to see if she could improvise and make it work. She can. I was then off to be Goddess X's test subject for Limey's recording.
Goddess X did share one comment that wraps up the session. She had called Goddess B earlier that day both to check on how the residual effects were from the intensity of the prior day (Goddess B was find, the good thoughts had taken root and the bad ones had been released from bothering her.) Regarding the session with me Goddess B had said something like
"I'm not sure if I can do this. . . Oh, to hell with it, I'm doing it"
That's the idea, Goddess B, you can do it, you did do it, and you can and will do it again. I think we really broke some barriers for you this time and now that you know that you can make it work, I think we will have some surprising sessions that will be fun and informative for us both.
She greeted me outside her door (in a place not visible to anyone else). I had just enough time to verbally remind her that today she was a Goddess when she tranced me with the "R" trigger.
With little deepening, she had me start right in on some housework related to a pending trip of hers including sweeping dust off of a suitcase, pouring cat food, stacking a hose, and refilling a bird feeder. She gave hypnotic phrases and deepenings as I was doing this, even getting into the tones of voice and timings she normally uses in her session room. I probably would have preferred some deepenings before starting in, but I am conditioned to that trance trigger, and to the degree I wasn't I was aware that she needed this and so I let myself go.
She awoke me and seemed a bit shy. Without her asking, I directly assured her that I was fine with what she was doing. That seemed to be all she needed and she retriggered me.
It is funny. I do not really enjoy the housework although it was better with the stream of her hypnotic patter than an earlier time when Goddess X zombified me for an hour with less than a minute of induction. I'd probably enjoy it more if I were deeper to start with because the inductions and deepenings do help me get rid of the world from which I came. What is funny is that whether it is what I would have most enjoyed or not was not relevant to whether I was doing it. Both Goddess B and Goddess X have demonstrated that with very minimal triggering that they can have me doing household chores. Whether I had a choice about doing them or not is a theoretical question because thoughts of not doing them never crossed my mind. It might not have been my favorite thing, but she told me to do it, and I did it without question. As I look back on it, I see that there is some profound declaration or indication of surrender in this.
I washed my hands in there somewhere, I'm not sure if it was while under or not.
After retriggering, she took me into her kitchen where I did something trivial with a water jug. The next stop was her living room where she asked me if I played any instruments (regretfully, no). She then had me discuss the weather (why does she always chose this?) and then wind up and look at a music box she had in there.
I found that while I had encouraged her to not be worried about the massage parts of the session that I was missing them. There is something deeply soothing in entering "that" room, undressing and getting on the table, and zoning out to her voice and touches.
She awakened me. I again assured her without being asked that all was fine from my point of view as I knew she would be concerned about this. She retranced me and took me to her studio. She had me sit on the unmade massage table (no sheets) and used a pendulum on me. I have a strong image of watching it as she stood before me and of repeating her phrases, but the pendulum magic seems to have again worked – despite having repeated the phrases several times, I do not remember what they were! They were probably related to going deeper, to her being a Goddess, to my doing anything she asks, and maybe about emailing, but I'm not sure if I might not be just filling in the blank with miscellaneous associations.
She then had me make the table. Handling fitted sheets is normally no big deal, but it was a bit of a challenge while hypnotized. She then had me undress and get under the sheets and then call her.
The session then started to fall into our common pattern. She probably was rushing a bit because her total time was less due to the other activities, but the rushing was not obvious. She also threw in more hypnotic commanding activities including activating a Minnie Mouse doll. I don’t know what she had planned as the doll's batteries were dead.
She awoke me in mid massage to discuss the prior day's session where I had helped with her cathartic hypnotized release. She said that I was very effective as a hypnotist. We talked of two key moments as I saw them, one when she gave that paragraph of pained questions to her husband, the one that said so much both in words and between the lines. The other was when she was on the verge of accepting her worth and need a bit of pushing to let the thought settle inside of her.
After retriggering and some more massage, she had me light a candle can (a candle with 3 wicks) and kneel in front of it for a bit while she said some things about which I now have no memories. She also couldn't help herself and just had to give me what she perceived as beneficial suggestions, this time relating to exercise. (She had not read my blogged comments re this.) She delivered a rational that helping me was helping her. I know how hard it is for her to simply accept attention or help and to do things for herself rather than for others, so I guess some of this was needed for her comfort.
After she had awakened me we had a bit of discussion, mostly about this next week when I will not be seeing her due to schedule limitations. Goddess B did comment that she did not make notes for this session, that she had wanted to see if she could improvise and make it work. She can. I was then off to be Goddess X's test subject for Limey's recording.
Goddess X did share one comment that wraps up the session. She had called Goddess B earlier that day both to check on how the residual effects were from the intensity of the prior day (Goddess B was find, the good thoughts had taken root and the bad ones had been released from bothering her.) Regarding the session with me Goddess B had said something like
"I'm not sure if I can do this. . . Oh, to hell with it, I'm doing it"
That's the idea, Goddess B, you can do it, you did do it, and you can and will do it again. I think we really broke some barriers for you this time and now that you know that you can make it work, I think we will have some surprising sessions that will be fun and informative for us both.
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