Forget the Saturation
5/05/2005
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In 5 for 5, a week to remember I described the wonders of being hypnotized each day of the week by different Mistresses. I thought at that time that the week might well be unique in my life, that I might never again have such a week. Well, I've had 4 of them. Not quite every day, but at least 4 times a week and once 3 times in a day by three different Mistresses.
So what is the effect of all this hypno-saturation? Well, I still like being hypnotized just as much. I am much more secure that I'll have this release again and I'm not on the constant lookout for a possible supply. (I've even been in a room full of female tists and did not "sample the buffet" even mentally. That's inconceivable to one who has this fetish.) The security of the supply also brings another form of comfort and security – I am secure that there are those who do not find this kink to be too weird, and consequently I do not think of myself so much as being weird, isolated, or out there. A discussion in fdhypnovideo showed that all who responded would prefer to keep this fetish/interest or even like to have it intensified. I always enjoyed this interest, but it has also been a source of torment for me. No longer. I not only enjoy the interest, I am happy with it and with having it.
There is another effect of this hypnotized saturation that is interesting, and that is that I am forgetting more and more and an blissfully content with that as well. I once wrote in What is it with forgetting? that forgetting represents a true letting go but that the biggest obstacle for me was that "I find hypnosis fascinating and I naturally want to know what went on while I was there. Who wants to forget something so cool?" Maybe with saturation I'm starting to accept that the nirvanic trances are not so rare that I absolutely have to record each moment for later savoring, that I can just bliss out because, after all, there will be more times, many more times.
That is a great feeling.
Maybe this answers my earlier question that "If this is such a special week to remember, why is so much of it a clouded memory?"
So what is the effect of all this hypno-saturation? Well, I still like being hypnotized just as much. I am much more secure that I'll have this release again and I'm not on the constant lookout for a possible supply. (I've even been in a room full of female tists and did not "sample the buffet" even mentally. That's inconceivable to one who has this fetish.) The security of the supply also brings another form of comfort and security – I am secure that there are those who do not find this kink to be too weird, and consequently I do not think of myself so much as being weird, isolated, or out there. A discussion in fdhypnovideo showed that all who responded would prefer to keep this fetish/interest or even like to have it intensified. I always enjoyed this interest, but it has also been a source of torment for me. No longer. I not only enjoy the interest, I am happy with it and with having it.
There is another effect of this hypnotized saturation that is interesting, and that is that I am forgetting more and more and an blissfully content with that as well. I once wrote in What is it with forgetting? that forgetting represents a true letting go but that the biggest obstacle for me was that "I find hypnosis fascinating and I naturally want to know what went on while I was there. Who wants to forget something so cool?" Maybe with saturation I'm starting to accept that the nirvanic trances are not so rare that I absolutely have to record each moment for later savoring, that I can just bliss out because, after all, there will be more times, many more times.
That is a great feeling.
Maybe this answers my earlier question that "If this is such a special week to remember, why is so much of it a clouded memory?"
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