Mistress N's comfort
4/26/2005
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Just had a nighttime unannounced trancing from Mistress N, my Mistress of Relaxation. She called within by general safe-to-call window and quickly started in. I do respond to her very quickly when she makes that voice change. After a few seconds my head was both heavy and light, and I had nothing happening except what was happening with her. Some staircase counting down and I got into that chain of consciousness rambling I sometimes do. She, of course, is directing the chain of consciousness so the rambling is generally echoing my perception of what I heard.
There were quite a few directives to deepen, and to submit more fully to her and all had an impact.
It is funny. I've met her in person just once and while we could chat and get to know each other a bit more there was no opportunity for hypnotic interaction. Nothing about her outward appearance and demeanor announces that she would like to sometimes be in control, in complete control actually. You might look at her and think "I wish" but you would not think "“she might". While I did not try it I expect that there is a good chance she might have blushed if I had leaned over and whispered "You are my Mistress of Relaxation, I will submit to you or your voice instantly and absolutely”." The blush is just a possibility, but she certainly would have felt a rush. I wish I had done such a whisper.
There is simplicity in deep surrender that is hard to describe because it is so profoundly simple. There are so many things I'm not doing, things that I otherwise am always doing. I feel free and uninhibited, and I either do not care what is happening or I actively want to please my Mistress. Mistress N, as our relationship currently stands, is the perfect Mistress for this. She seems to genuinely love to have me deep, to have that control, and while she loves having that influence she is very careful in how she uses it. (I sometimes get the feeling that there is something more she almost does, but then holds back on. Mistress N, please know that the Promise of Forgiveness applies to you as well.)
What she does do is leave me with little hypno-toys. Limited duration but intense hypnotic behaviors that I can play with after the session. (I'm buzzing as I write this – that is probably one of the hypno-toys.) Tonight I will be wrapped in feelings of comfort and love as I wrap the blanket around me before falling nirvanically into a wonderful sleep, and I will get another rush of acknowledgement of her power when touching that blanket when getting up in the morning.
The simple formula: I let go, I surrender and submit, I place myself totally and unquestioningly into her control, she directs me, we both have fun, we both achieve some balance, she gives me some residual benefits or toys, and brings me back relieved and improved.
I do want to submit to her, and I want her to have the power to make me submit. I get an ongoing rush knowing that she might call, and sometimes, like tonight, she does. I want to be in her sweet control, I want to please her, I want to obey her, and I want to ease her way by letting her express this side of herself with me.
I like the idea that there is somebody out there (several of them now) that can send me away. That there are such people makes my being sent away an actual ongoing possibility and brings the benifits of surrender more into daily life.
Mistress N and I have a playful relationship. We deliberately avoid fixed time appointments and let it be semi-spontaneous. This probably would not work for very many people and it only works because I have predictable and stable time windows, which is not a common situation for me. We are probably going somewhere with the submissions, but I don't think either of us knows where. It is pretty cool as it is, so it does not have to go anywhere, but it probably will. Finding out where will be fascinating.
There were quite a few directives to deepen, and to submit more fully to her and all had an impact.
It is funny. I've met her in person just once and while we could chat and get to know each other a bit more there was no opportunity for hypnotic interaction. Nothing about her outward appearance and demeanor announces that she would like to sometimes be in control, in complete control actually. You might look at her and think "I wish" but you would not think "“she might". While I did not try it I expect that there is a good chance she might have blushed if I had leaned over and whispered "You are my Mistress of Relaxation, I will submit to you or your voice instantly and absolutely”." The blush is just a possibility, but she certainly would have felt a rush. I wish I had done such a whisper.
There is simplicity in deep surrender that is hard to describe because it is so profoundly simple. There are so many things I'm not doing, things that I otherwise am always doing. I feel free and uninhibited, and I either do not care what is happening or I actively want to please my Mistress. Mistress N, as our relationship currently stands, is the perfect Mistress for this. She seems to genuinely love to have me deep, to have that control, and while she loves having that influence she is very careful in how she uses it. (I sometimes get the feeling that there is something more she almost does, but then holds back on. Mistress N, please know that the Promise of Forgiveness applies to you as well.)
What she does do is leave me with little hypno-toys. Limited duration but intense hypnotic behaviors that I can play with after the session. (I'm buzzing as I write this – that is probably one of the hypno-toys.) Tonight I will be wrapped in feelings of comfort and love as I wrap the blanket around me before falling nirvanically into a wonderful sleep, and I will get another rush of acknowledgement of her power when touching that blanket when getting up in the morning.
The simple formula: I let go, I surrender and submit, I place myself totally and unquestioningly into her control, she directs me, we both have fun, we both achieve some balance, she gives me some residual benefits or toys, and brings me back relieved and improved.
I do want to submit to her, and I want her to have the power to make me submit. I get an ongoing rush knowing that she might call, and sometimes, like tonight, she does. I want to be in her sweet control, I want to please her, I want to obey her, and I want to ease her way by letting her express this side of herself with me.
I like the idea that there is somebody out there (several of them now) that can send me away. That there are such people makes my being sent away an actual ongoing possibility and brings the benifits of surrender more into daily life.
Mistress N and I have a playful relationship. We deliberately avoid fixed time appointments and let it be semi-spontaneous. This probably would not work for very many people and it only works because I have predictable and stable time windows, which is not a common situation for me. We are probably going somewhere with the submissions, but I don't think either of us knows where. It is pretty cool as it is, so it does not have to go anywhere, but it probably will. Finding out where will be fascinating.
3 Comments:
How did you sleep last night, my most submissive one?
Yes, you are right. I probably would have blushed the other day.
Wouldn't you have been surprised if I had said "Submit to me, NOW!".
Who knows, one day I may surprise you when you don't expect me to be somewhere.
I slept deeply and without disturbance. It is hard to tell if it was wonderful or not because I do not remember much of it. It was fun remembering you when I touched the blanket to arise.
I might have been surprized, after I woke up. Your voice and your interest in having me submit is all that is needed in a suitable environment.
Well Mistress N, it looks like you will need to try again if you want to surprize me in person. It still was fun! (This entry was made after the "Giving Notice" entry).